tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post1947528364297192958..comments2023-12-26T17:10:25.915-06:00Comments on Muddling through Mayhem: Communicationmarythemomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08205319256573120866noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-51911513693757900452009-10-07T10:50:24.151-05:002009-10-07T10:50:24.151-05:00Having raised three "normal" boys, I'...Having raised three "normal" boys, I'll tell you a bit about what's "normal" for a high schooler. <br /><br />All three of my sons played football, which was a DAILY after school practice. 5 days a week for 3-4 months they would get home between 6 or 7pm, eat dinner, then watch TV and/or do homework, go to bed at 10 or 11 (depending on age) and get up at 6:30 the next morning and start it all over again. *(Yes, I know they weren't getting enough sleep, but they're all owls and wouldn't go to bed any earlier.) Football helped my boys build up self-confidence and self-esteem in a protected, regimented, strict environment, similar to the ROTC program Bear is in. It is not uncommon for high schoolers to have this kind of a schedule year-round with various seasonal sports. <br /><br />Yea, I know my kids are different. I could trust them and I knew they were in a safe environment. I knew that this program was helping to give them the "wings" they needed to survive adulthood. Some of my friends had kids they were anxious about; those moms and dads picked their boys up from practice and drove them home in their own cars so they could talk about the boy's day and debrief a bit after a grueling practice. With three other kids at home I always let my kids figure out their own rides/carpools or busses to get home on their own... and most of this was before they had cell phones. <br /><br />You know I still struggle with my boys even though they're in college now. They seem to always need money and/or help from us. I'm not saying I am or was a perfect mom, far from it... but I hope that we didn't go too far off track.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-78756641243636506632009-10-07T00:52:42.441-05:002009-10-07T00:52:42.441-05:00Bear is being 2. He is just a very smart and big 2...Bear is being 2. He is just a very smart and big 2-year-old. 2-year-olds hate having to come inside while they were playing. But they hate even worse the feeling that there isn't a grown-up in control. <br /><br />You have said "I will be your grown-up" and so he is supposed to be safe to act like a 2 year old, he acts like one (because he needs to!) and then you get mad at him for acting like that and he doesn't understand why you are mad. He needs to know that you are the one in control. Your job is just so much harder when you can't pick him up and put him in his playpen. ... He may not fully accept you because you do not fully accept him ... <br /><br />I did such a lousy job with this stuff with my eldest. He still really cannot handle it when I cry (or freak out) I can almost see him turn 2 when I do, but then his actions are to yell at me and follow me around and I can't calm down with that ...<br /><br />Every time your husband sides with Bear over you, he pours out more from your cup. You can't solve such a huge problem if you aren't a team.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com