tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post8794612007054625093..comments2023-12-26T17:10:25.915-06:00Comments on Muddling through Mayhem: Adult FAIR Clubmarythemomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08205319256573120866noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-25288935860411916252014-06-06T20:53:55.276-05:002014-06-06T20:53:55.276-05:00Miz K - sort of. She started taking bc, but doesn...Miz K - sort of. She started taking bc, but doesn't remember that the doctor warned her that it wouldn't be very effective because of her meds (they keep it from working well). On top of that, she's not taking it regularly (because she's not coming home and also just forgets).<br /><br />Anonymous - I know I'm not going to convince you, but I'll state our reasoning again. <br /><br />Paying rent is essential for her for many reasons: <br /> a) She learns an adult independent living skill (paying rent is something she'll pretty much be doing the rest of her life). <br /> b) If she has more than $2000, (including property/ assets), she LOSES her SSI, including Medicaid. Since her medications alone are almost $2K a month, that cannot be an option. <br /> c) She NEEDS something to spend her money on, besides junk food and stuff from Amazon.<br /><br />If you're referring to the uber detailed rules and restrictions... these are because she lives in a black and white world and needs concrete rules that are well spelled out. What seems so obvious that it doesn't need to be said (like don't create a giant health hazard in the space we used to call your bedroom...), must be spelled out so she understands that we're not "picking on her," we're just enforcing the rules. She may not be happy about them and it is difficult for her to comply, but if they're not written out, then she assumes they're not real.<br />marythemomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08205319256573120866noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-2666012063886290362014-06-06T11:51:09.048-05:002014-06-06T11:51:09.048-05:00So you are going to fleece her for her social secu...So you are going to fleece her for her social security money as per that ridiculous "boarder agreement".<br />I hope she wises up and leaves before you get her to sign that ridiculous document.<br />Run Kitty, RUN!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-3858147725052251782014-06-04T16:33:49.547-05:002014-06-04T16:33:49.547-05:00New boyfriend plus being away overnight sounds lik...New boyfriend plus being away overnight sounds like trouble. I hope she's on some form of birth control.Miz Kizzlehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05650747741395559803noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-8992860827438604742014-06-04T00:51:11.402-05:002014-06-04T00:51:11.402-05:00Kitty is not handling this well, but this is not s...Kitty is not handling this well, but this is not surprising, since she believes that being an adult means you can do anything you want, and instead we tell her "if you want to be treated like an adult, you need to act like one." <br /><br />Anonymous - Yes, the boarder agreement is basically the same one from last fall.marythemomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08205319256573120866noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-38885925089663246032014-06-03T22:14:45.958-05:002014-06-03T22:14:45.958-05:00Will the boarder agreement be the same one from la...Will the boarder agreement be the same one from last fall? Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-89821584374256899002014-06-03T05:55:30.277-05:002014-06-03T05:55:30.277-05:00I think that all of your requirements seem reasona...I think that all of your requirements seem reasonable. Based on what you have disclosed about Kitty and her issues up to this point, I would not expect her to follow many (if any) of these requirements on her own, without many, many prompts and many, many meltdowns.<br /><br />While you are right that she may never be able to live completely self supporting and independently you also have to imagine what life in your home will be like if she continues to come and go as she pleases, until all hours, with anyone she deems appropriate. It sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. I wish I had the name of a great facility that helps transition young adults to the real world gradually, with high supervision - you know, like families are supposed to do (in theory anyway, not possible with some of our kids who don't trust us enough to believe we are trying to help them and not just limit them).<br /><br />Having Bob so close in age and with the abilities to do typical, age appropriate things must be hard for Kitty to handle, but you can't let it get under your skin. Celebrate Bob's accomplishments whole heartedly - Kitty is the one who needs to stop comparing and critiquing how you handle things.<br /><br />Good luck!!!Lisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14612523674452864077noreply@blogger.com