tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post3229099229968089024..comments2023-12-26T17:10:25.915-06:00Comments on Muddling through Mayhem: Boarder Agreementmarythemomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08205319256573120866noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-36840111699578551332016-06-13T09:26:51.409-05:002016-06-13T09:26:51.409-05:00I understand and agree with your philosophy and co...I understand and agree with your philosophy and costs. As a parent of a similar young person, I see the necessity. Obviously all the anonymous people haven't kids with these limitations. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-54555127513841693472015-03-26T19:54:46.629-05:002015-03-26T19:54:46.629-05:00Yet another Anonymous... says... More power to her...Yet another Anonymous... says... More power to her if she can live successfully somewhere else and cheaper! That would sure simplify your life considerably! The unlistable assistance you provide is invaluable.<br /><br />As the mom of kids who are also too impacted to respond to the many years of methods we have exhausted... I sure wish people would be supportive unless they have walked a mile...<br /><br />no venom, just wishing.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-39701246043321511422014-06-10T18:32:41.915-05:002014-06-10T18:32:41.915-05:00I just want to clarify that there are more than on...I just want to clarify that there are more than one anonymous commenters. I am the one who urged Kitty to run because you are fleecing her for her social security money. Not that she is allowed to read the horrendous and intrusive things you write about her. Why would you let her do that? Anyway,this is my first comment on this particular post.<br />$650 a month is a lot of money and you know it.<br />It is amazing to me that you have touted your unFAIR club for years while still admitting it does not work for Kitty or Bear. AND YOU ARE STILL DOING IT!<br />Mind blown.<br />And let me get this straight...according to your own words Kitty doesn't like you so it must be because she has brain damage? Really? It's not because you treat her like a prisoner and have for years. It's not because you impose horrendously unfair rules and play favorites. She doesn't like you so she's brain damaged?!!<br />Well, Kitty is smart enough to see you treat your bio children better than her. Kitty is smart enough to see through unFAIR Club.<br />Brain damage.<br />And you wonder why Kitty is running back to her biofamily?<br />You failed this child.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-62755126642167323212014-06-10T03:11:36.895-05:002014-06-10T03:11:36.895-05:00The FAIR Club does not work well for kids like Kit...The FAIR Club does not work well for kids like Kitty and Bear. It was designed to help our unique combination of neurotypical kids and kids of trauma. Sort of level the playing field so the NT kids didn't feel like their siblings were "getting away" with something, and Kitty and Bear got consequences appropriate to their needs.<br /><br />Eventually, we adapted it so that Kitty and Bear lived the FAIR Club all the time. They need the structure and support all the time, and Kitty did not need to feel she was being "punished" by being put in the FAIR Club. I don't care if you believe me or not about Kitty and Bear needing more structure than NT kids. We/they learned the hard way that they do.<br /><br />I've answered your questions about less expensive living options in other comments/ posts, but short version - yes, there are less expensive options, but they are not in areas Kitty feels are safe and would require public transportation, which scares Kitty. Also Kitty would need a lot of support to be able to live "independently." She cannot understand legal documents, she does not understand money (and runs through it like water), cannot pay her bills unless they coincidentally happen on a day when she just got paid (assuming she remembers to pay them), she has issues with cleanliness and hygiene, and is not able to consistently care for her medical issues - particularly medication.<br /><br />There is a reason Kitty is eligible for Legal Guardianship, and a lot of it greatly effects her ability to live independently. If you really want Kitty to run, I hope you plan for her to run to you, and you can support her.marythemomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08205319256573120866noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-34135822054965766612014-06-09T20:13:12.801-05:002014-06-09T20:13:12.801-05:00The agreement says the $650 covers:
OWNERS agree ...The agreement says the $650 covers: <br />OWNERS agree to provide the following:<br />• Electricity/ Gas<br />• Phone (landline)<br />• Trash Removal/ Water / Recycling<br />• Food served in the home/ Consumables (not including eating out)<br />• Internet Service/Cable/TV<br />• HOA fees/ property taxes<br /><br />Not included: Health Insurance, Case management services, Transportation, WiFi/ Network.<br /><br />I don't know what city you're in, but I just surveyed a few rentals in Texas (Houston, Dallas/Ft Worth, and Austin), and it looks like there's a ton of rooms for rent: private room, shared common space, includes utilities, for around $400/mo. Plus, no Fair Club, forced therapy, and basic tenant's rights! Run, Kitty!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-60151844555670298532014-06-09T04:16:27.913-05:002014-06-09T04:16:27.913-05:00But the Boarder Agreement is $650 for the room, us...But the Boarder Agreement is $650 for the room, use of common areas, utilities, food in pantry (that's not marked and only in designated areas), meals in home. Kitty could totally rent a similar space in a home, prepare her own Spaghettio's, come out way ahead financially and not be subjected to a novella of conservative rules. <br />I totally hope you expose her to the choices of AC/JC, or group home living, so she can make her own path in life.<br /><br />Your prescriptive legalese and litany of rules is so over the top, I don't even think you can see how ridiculous it truly is. Poor Kitty doesn't stand a chance in understanding it. <br /><br />You've bought into this FAIR club and all too deeply.<br /><br />How well has FAIR club worked for Kitty and Bear? What are the results of years of the FAIR CLUB ACT?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-67237309070286103812014-06-09T02:24:19.242-05:002014-06-09T02:24:19.242-05:00Except she's not renting a room, she's ren...Except she's not renting a room, she's renting use of the entire house (except private bedrooms). She uses (and trashes) the kitchen, family room, laundry room, our vehicles, the game room, the backyard, all 4 bathrooms and various other rooms in the house. We eat out 2-3 times a week. I make home cooked, healthy meals the rest of the time. There is always a fully stocked refrigerator and pantry that she has full access to. We pay for her private health insurance and her over the counter medications out of pocket. We pay for most of her clothes, her choice of personal hygiene products, laundry detergent and cleaning supplies (which she doesn't use). We provide cable and pay for her cell phone service (although she is expected to pay for the very expensive iPhone SHE chose to purchase)... She has three minor chores (feeding the dogs at night, cleaning the cat litter, and taking the recycling from the kitchen to the garage)-- most of which she only does on an irregular basis... with multiple prompts.<br /><br />She doesn't pay $650 right now, and won't until/if she gets SSI. She pays $100 right now, and that is so she learns about paying rent and her bills. I think we're being incredibly reasonable, but she always has a choice. She can choose to live somewhere else.marythemomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08205319256573120866noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-66203262732610885862014-06-09T00:49:57.289-05:002014-06-09T00:49:57.289-05:00Except she's not renting an apartment. She'...Except she's not renting an apartment. She's renting a ROOM. This is muddled mayhem, you've at least got that right!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-20453472023582520582014-06-08T21:44:12.917-05:002014-06-08T21:44:12.917-05:00r - I know! Crazy, right?! Where we live though,...r - I know! Crazy, right?! Where we live though, a small one bedroom apartment is about $750 and that wouldn't include utilities, food, or any of the luxuries Kitty believes are essential - like WiFi and cable TV. <br /><br />The other part is that Kitty would receive ~$750/month from SSI, plus money from working. If she paid less in rent, then she would quickly accrue too much in savings and assets, and therefore would lose her SSI and Medicaid.<br /><br />Until her SSI starts, our plan was to stick with her paying only $100/month in rent so she could get used to the idea of paying bills. This is probably too little considering her current income, but she needs some money to pay co-pays on her medications (which is almost $200/mo while she's covered under our private insurance, since she doesn't have Medicaid).marythemomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08205319256573120866noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3852422397272068136.post-64643625557726373492014-06-08T19:50:47.507-05:002014-06-08T19:50:47.507-05:00Seriously? $650/month?!Seriously? $650/month?!r.https://www.blogger.com/profile/16308261231346881996noreply@blogger.com