Simple Rules for Adult Children Living at Home
by the amazing Kathleen Benckendorf
shared with permission
- Anyone living at home as an adult needs to have a spirit of cooperation and submission, NOT a contrary, self-serving spirit. Loophole seekers should find another place to live… example: "misunderstanding" directions/rules is not a valid excuse.
- You’re an adult. You’re responsible for managing your own life and responsibilities. We’re here to help and give advice, but mistakes or poor judgment on your part should not be turned into a crisis or emergency on our part.
- Be honest and trustworthy.
- Participate in family life and activities.
- No illegal behavior.
- No behavior that potentially endangers other family members or causes any family member to feel threatened or frightened.
- Be considerate of other family members and their possessions; be a good steward of the resources made available to you.
- Make forward progress on your life. (School, job, and/or significant emotional / maturity growth) Spend more time developing yourself than wasting brain cells… example: If you are spending more than two hours per day (combined) on TV, video games, texts, or facebook; then you are probably not making progress.
- Be a Net Positive – contribute more than you “cost” us, whether $ or stress or work or whatever.
- If you are paying reduced or no rent, you must be a good steward of your own finances and you must be accountable to Mom & Dad for your income and spending.
- It’s not your house. Get permission before altering anything (hanging things on walls, painting, etc.), or changing the status quo in any way (getting a pet, having friends over, etc.).
- Life isn’t fair. Do what’s right, regardless. We don’t keep score. Do more than what you think is your share. If everybody does that, everything gets done and done right. If you only try to do what you think is fair: then it is usually not enough, nothing gets completed, and the task is left for Mom and Dad to finish… which earns you almost no credit for what you did do.