This blog is my place to vent and share resources with other parents of children of trauma. I try to be open and honest about my feelings in order to help others know they are not alone. Therapeutic parenting of adopted teenagers with RAD and other severe mental illnesses and issues (plus "neurotypical" teens) , is not easy, and there are time when I say what I feel... at the moment. We're all human!

Monday, February 14, 2022

Questions to Ask When You're Considering Placement of a Child



23 Crucial Questions to Ask at Foster Care Placement Meetings:

  1. Ask to speak with current caregivers to understand the child’s current schedule and routines.
  2. Get a list of previous placements, how long they lasted, and why they disrupted.
  3. What prompted the termination of parental rights? Did either parent voluntarily surrender, and why? Try to get the psychiatric history of the birth parents.
  4. What circumstances put the child in foster care. Is any of the child's history known, in particular any traumatic events? 
  5. If adopting, why didn’t past foster parents adopt this child/children?
  6. Was the child exposed to alcohol or drugs during pregnancy? A clear answer is often not available unless the child is young, and hospital records from birth are available. Still, you can get information on the birth mother’s lifestyle and habits to understand the possibilities better. Also, ask if the child’s siblings have shown evidence of fetal alcohol spectrum disorder (FASD) or prenatal drug exposure. Keep in mind that prenatal alcohol and drug exposure is prevalent for children in foster care.
  7. Does the child have siblings, and where are they now (adoption, relatives, residential care, etc.)? Why are they not being placed together?
  8. Where are the biological parents now? Are these relatives or extended family in the area near you? What is the expectation for ongoing contact with birth parents, siblings, or extended family?
  9. What type of relationship did this child have with birth parents?
  10. Does the child have an Individualized Education Plan (IEP) for school? Is the child struggling in school? What is his/her attitude toward school? What school did the child attend previously?
  11. Does the child make and maintain age-appropriate friends?
  12. Ask for a list of diagnoses, and what behavior may have led to the diagnosis.
  13. Who made the diagnosis? Foster parent? Pediatrician? School? Medical Specialist? Ask for the documentation.
  14. What kind of medication is the child on now, if any, and what medications has the child taken previously?
  15. Are there any current health or behavioral concerns or need for ongoing therapy?
  16. If the child has been in therapy, how long? What types of models of treatment have been used?
  17. Has or has this child ever had a diagnosis of RAD (Reactive Attachment Disorder) or any other type of attachment disorder? What has been done for this child to deal with this? (Therapy, holdings, play therapy, etc.)
  18. Has the child acted out sexually now or in the past? What type of behaviors, and when was the last time?
  19. Are there safety concerns with pets? Younger children?
  20. What kinds of hospitalization (including trips to the Emergency Room) has this child had? What tests were done? Ask for the documentation.
  21. How does this child perceive herself? Does the child understand adoption, and does she want to be adopted?
  22. If the child is not a member of your race/ethnicity, how does he feel about being a member of a family of a different race/ethnicity?
  23. Ask to see the child’s entire file, not just a summary. Arrange for a time that you can read through the file uninterrupted.
  24. Ask yourself: if this child were to get no better after placement in your home, could you handle his/her behaviors just as they are now?

More Questions To Ask

Questions to ask Parents/Family members
1. Tell me about the child
2. Activities enjoyed
3. How often do you speak to/visit with the child?
4. What is your plan or goal for your child? Desire for reunification?
5. What help do you need from me, DSS to achieve that goal?
6. Other family for visitation/placement/support resources

Questions to ask Child
1. What are your interests?
2. How do you feel about school? What do you like about school?
3. Have you visited/spoken to relatives? How often? How did it go?
4. Do you like the foster/group home?
5. Any problems? Who did you tell? Outcome?
6. Where would you like to live? What do you want for your future?

Questions to ask DSS Social Worker
1. Confirm placement and contact information
2. Do you have contact information for the child’s Therapist, Psychiatrist, Foster Parents, Family
Members, etc.?
3. Request updated information (placement, etc.)
4. Date of last facilitation meeting? Request results from it. Request copy of current case plan.
5. Has the child been assigned a parent (educational ) surrogate (only if necessary)?
6. Have you visited with the family? How often? How did the visits go?
7. What services/programs is the child part of? (ECI, public school pre-K, CASA)

Questions to ask Foster Parents
1. How are things going? How is his/her behavior?
2. Does he/she get along with the family? Are there other kids in the home? Are they foster kids
or biological kids? 
3. How does the child do in School? Homework?
4. What is the child’s regular schedule? Routines? Activities? How does the child handle changes in routines or activities?
5. Concerns (get details about any incidents)?
6. Does he/she talk to/family members? How often? Behavior after?
7. Is the child in therapy? Is he/she on medication? Does he/she take it?
8. Appointment up to date? (medical, dental, vision)
9. Does he visit family members? Who? Where? How often? Who provides the transportation
10. Does the child participate in any after-school/recreational/ activities?

Questions to ask Group Home Manager
1. How does the child get along with the staff? Other residents?
2. Has he/she integrated himself into group home life?
3. How is his/her behavior in general? Any specific incidents? Request incident reports
4. Is he/she receiving therapy
5. Is he/she taking his medication?
6. What are his/her strengths?
7. What area does he/she need more support in?
8. Does he/she participate in group home events? What activities does the group home offer?
9. Does he/she follow the rules? Does he/she obey the curfew?
10. May I have a copy of his/her treatment plan? When is the next treatment planning meeting?
11. Does he/she talk to /see family members? How often? (specifically those named in case file)
12. Does he/she visit family members? Who? Where? How often? Who transports?

Questions to ask Therapist
1. How often is the child seen? Does he keep his appointments? If not, why?
2. Is he/she open to therapy? Is he/she engaged?
3. May I have copies of any assessments, reports, and visit notes?
4. Recommendations? (Anger management, structured activities, mentor, family therapy, etc.)
5. Is there any other type of therapy that would be beneficial that he/she is not receiving?
(family,group,play)

Questions to ask Foster Care Agency Worker
1. Activities
2. Concerns
3. Visits w/family
4. Therapy/medication
5. Appointments
6. Notes from most recent treatment team meeting/next scheduled team meeting?

Questions to ask Mental Health Professional
1. What has he/she been diagnosed with?
2. Has he/she been prescribed medication? Which ones? Dosages? How often evaluated?
3. How often is the child seen?
4. Can you fax me a copy of your most recent Psychiatric evaluation?

Questions to ask School Guidance Counselor
1. May I have a printout of his/her attendance records?
2. Who is contacted when he/she is absent? How are they contacted?
3. May I have a copy of his/her most recent report card/progress report?
4. Has he/she completed his community service hours? (High school students)
5. Has he/she taken the HSAs? What were the results? ( High School Students)
6. Does he/she have a record of misbehaving? Request incident reports (suspensions, expulsions)
7. Has an IEP been requested? When? By whom? Status? Can I get a copy of it?
8. What resources are available at the school? (tutoring, test prep, online assignments /grades)
9. What classes are required to graduate? Is the child on track to graduate on time?
10. What extracurricular activities are offered?
11. Parent/educational contact information

Questions to ask Childcare
1. Does he/she attend class regularly?
2. How is his/her behavior?
3. In your opinion, is the child on track with other children developmentally?
4. What is the child’s regular schedule? Routines? Activities? How does the child handle changes in routines or activities?
5. What activities are available for the child? Does he/she participate?
6. Does he/she follow the rules? 
7. Does he/she ask for help when he does not understand something?
8. What can I do to help him/her be more successful?
9. What are the child’s strengths?

Questions to ask Teachers
1. What class do you teach? ( Information is online)
2. What time does he/she attend your class? (Information is on schedule)
3. Does he/she attend your class regularly? (See attendance records)
4. When he/she attends class, is he on time? (tardies are shown on attendance records)
5. Is he/she prepared (homework, books, paper, and pen)?
6. How is his/her behavior?
7. How many homework assignments have been given? What were his/her grades on each?
8. How many tests has he been given? What were his/her grades on them?
9. Are extra credits offered?
10. Does he/she actively participate in class?
11. Does he/she ask for help when he does not understand the lesson?
12. In your opinion, is he/she able to do the work?
13. Do you offer tutoring?
14. What can I do to help him/her be more successful in school?
15. What are the child’s strengths?
16. Request a copy of the syllabus/classroom expectations

Questions to ask Probation Officer
1. What are the terms of his probation?
2. Is he complying with the terms of his probation?
3. How often does he have to visit you?

Note: This list of basic questions is only a quide. All of the questions may not be appropriate for each
case. You may need to ask different people the same questions to make sure that everyone is on the
same page. Also, ask everyone that you speak to when is the best time to contact them.


Keep track of everyone's answers! DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT!!
Not only to help you remember everything, but this can help you get services for your child and can help protect you and your family from false allegations.