Blogging on Privacy

Annie over at One Mother's Day recently wrote a blog post called Second Thoughts regarding posting about our kids. It seems to me there are different categories of bloggers.

Cutesy - these seem more for out of state grandparents. They are mostly pictures of the kids and what cute thing they've done lately. I don't know much about these because I don't read them.

Diary - a place to vent that's written more for the blogger themself without thinking too much about what others want to read. This is definitely how my blog started. I did want people to maybe give me some words of affirmation though so I started broadening my category.

Entertainment - these are usually flat out funny. You're not going to see much of the dirty side of life (unless it's funny). Pioneer Woman, Because I Said So, Pulsipher Predilictions...

Informational - focused on a specific topic like photography, RAD parenting, who knows.

I hope my blog is entertaining although I don't try as hard to be funny as I used to in the beginning. I definitely want my blog to be informational. I need words of affirmation so I want to provide something that people will comment about.

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Privacy versus Letting it All Hang Out.

Some people use their real names and their kids real names while others use cutesy nicknames or Child#1 though 7. On the comments of One Mother's Day the consensus appeared to be against using cutesy nick names. Oh well. Obviously my kids's real names are not Bear, Kitty, Bob or Ponito (although sometimes I slip and call them that).

Some have pictures. Others have no pictures or identifying information at all. My mom hates that I include pictures of my kids. I love being able to share pictures of my gorgeous babies.

Of those that share "private information" - Some parents ask their kids what they're comfortable having shared on the blog. Some don't identify which of their children are misbehaving and/or speak in generalities (obviously this only works for those that have more than one or two children). Then there are parents like me who don't ask the kids and just share.

I liked one of the comments on One Mother's Day regarding how it doesn't bother her kids as much what she writes on her blog because the kids assume the parent says the same things to her friends, and maybe less because most of the people who read the blog might be people the blogger doesn't know IRL (in real life). I've found this is true for me too. I don't find myself venting to people IRL, of course some of that is because I don't talk to people IRL as much.

I worry sometimes what would happen if the kids or their birthmom read my blog. Somedays I kind of want Birthmom to read it, so she gets a clue what she did to these kids.

I know it bothers Bear what I write on here. It bothers Kitty too. I think a little of this is guilty conscience. Mostly Bear can't stand anyone talking about him at all. I need it though.

I never really thought about would happen if my kids found my blog. I think it's pretty safe in that it's not associated with my real name at all so unlike my facebook account you can't search for my name and find it (did I mention Biomom found me on Facebook last year? I closed my account. I didn't use it much anyway).

Truthfully I think nothing much would happen if the kids did find it. Of course Bear doesn't read, but if he actually did read it he would be mad. This is his response to all "labels" and other's opinions. It's his way of running away from the truth. Of course he doesn't need any more reason to be mad at me. Overall it wouldn't make much difference.

One of my readers posts on her blog about her life, her family, and recently, her plans for adopting again. Her "adult" daughter finds this adoption inconvenient and has been sabotaging her mother's plans with IRL friends and family. Recently her daughter posted a comment on her mother's blog about how unfair it is for her mother to do this to her. It was a selfish, self-centered, entitled comment and of course the daughter only showed how mentally ill she really is. I could see my son making a comment exactly like it. What is truely sad is that apparently the blogger seems to have shut down her blog completely.

I don't want to post my friend's name here, but she knows who she is. I want you to know that I think your daughter is way out of line and I hope you don't stop blogging forever. Hugs and prayers are going up for you and your whole family (including those who are becoming part of your family).