This blog is my place to vent and share resources with other parents of children of trauma. I try to be open and honest about my feelings in order to help others know they are not alone. Therapeutic parenting of adopted teenagers with RAD and other severe mental illnesses and issues (plus "neurotypical" teens) , is not easy, and there are time when I say what I feel... at the moment. We're all human!
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
It's too much.
It's too much. After a grueling therapy session following a bad week full of more verbal abuse, which has finally caused me to seriously think of dissolving 17yo Kitty's adoption for my own protection, I received this text from 18yo Bear who moved out in January. "U r really screwed up u know that right"
When I texted him back asking what the heck he was talking about since only this morning I'd taken him to the orthopedist to check on the cast he was supposed to be wearing (ripped it off recently) for breaking his hand AGAIN and he was rude, but fine. After I'd dropped him back at school, he'd called Hubby and asked for $20 for lunch. He gets free lunches at school, but Hubby had given him $20 last week and I guess he thought he deserved more.
I received this text almost an hour later, "U heard me im taking yall to court by the way" No response to my texts and it's been over 4 hours.
Hubby is worried because we've continued receiving Bear's adoption subsidy, even though he moved out mid-January. We've justified it by the fact that I've continued with his case management, and until he went off his meds in March and Kitty came home we would have allowed him to return home and kept his room available (although we've started renovations on it since it was so disgusting, it still has a bed - which he's used once or twice). We've been driving him places and he comes to dinner with the family every now and then.
Son has got it in his head that he deserves this money (nothing we can say will convince him it doesn't work that way). Hubby is afraid he'll manage to convince someone to let him sue us.
The subsidy ends in July anyway (when he turns 19), and we're already trying to figure out how to deal with that and the paycut my husband had to take to get a job with benefits that will help us with Kitty (who's been out of RTC for less than 2 weeks) and some medical treatments the rest of us need.
It's too much.