This blog is my place to vent and share resources with other parents of children of trauma. I try to be open and honest about my feelings in order to help others know they are not alone. Therapeutic parenting of adopted teenagers with RAD and other severe mental illnesses and issues (plus "neurotypical" teens) , is not easy, and there are time when I say what I feel... at the moment. We're all human!

Thursday, April 10, 2014

Treated like an "Adult"

Dealing with a lot with Kitty right now.  She finally got a cell phone.  It increased her addiction to electronics, but not by much, because it's not really possible to increase the amount of time she has spent on them!  She's also spending a lot of time on Face Book with biofamily and friends so far we haven't seen a lot of negative effects, except she's isolating herself even more than before and she's not dealing well with the stress of school.  Biomom is now only communicating with her, and not responding to the e-mails and photos I've sent.

Kitty has been sick a lot.  Alleged vomiting (always at night), nausea, headaches, sleepiness.  Honestly it's almost possible to know when it's real and when it's psycho somatic.  I try to be sympathetic, but it's hard when she has so many psychosomatic/ stress related incidents or those caused by her unwillingness to treat her constipation issues.  The school has already sent us an attendance letter regarding her unexcused absences.  We're trying to get a lot of medical appointments and testing done now because she loses her Medicaid at the end of this month, and we won't have it again until she gets SSI, which probably won't be for a couple of months if not longer.

Another big issue is that Kitty now has a boyfriend.  Same guy that she dated as a freshman (I think she hates change enough to go back to him).  When she was a freshman he was a senior.  He dumped her, probably because she wouldn't sleep with him.  She suffered a lot because he moved on to one of her friends, who would not heed her warnings.  Obviously our worry that he only wants to use her is even greater now.  She got into trouble about 4 months ago, because she was sneaking around meeting him at the grandparent's house.

She of course wants to be able to run around on dates with him, and is furious that I try to rein her in a little (asking her to start with supervised/ group dates and work up to us getting to know him well enough to trust him with her).  She's also not acting trustworthy.  She breaks the rules when she thinks I'm wrong.  She thinks the rules are just because we're being mean.  She also believes that the structure and rules we're providing has nothing to do with our concerns about her being ready for older teen responsibilities and is more about the fact that we love and trust Bob more (despite the fact that Bob has the same rules).

By the way, YES, I know I'm overprotective.  I also know she's not ready to have the same privileges as a "normal" 18yo (I also don't think any of my kids should be doing what "normal" teenagers do.  I grew up in a big city.  I know how severe the consequences of one bad choice can be.), but this is not because I'm "mean."  I just don't know how to explain to her that she's different from other kids her age without effecting her self-esteem.  Plus, of course there's nothing I can really do to change her mind - her perception of reality is so distorted.

As always Kitty wants all freedom and privileges right now!! I know she's only 10(ish) and isn't ready for adult privileges, but I'm open to letting her take the steps (including increasing her responsibilities) to show us that she's ready for more privileges.  We're talking about reintroducing the level chart to give her a more concrete understanding of what she needs to do to show she's ready for older teen/ adult privileges and allow her to take steps to attain those privileges.  Of course she wants it all to be granted to her without earning it.

***

This has been coming to a head as Kitty gets closer and closer to graduation.  She is freaking out about this huge life change.  Not that I can blame her, but it's getting harder and harder to live with her.  She's realized that she can't afford to move out.  She's demanding that as a rent paying adult, we treat her like an adult, but she's also told us outright that she will not act like one around us.  She feels that as her parents we don't deserve the respect that she would give strangers.

***

Kitty is also talking about moving in with Biomom.  At first she was just planning on visiting for 2 weeks after graduation so she could spend time with her sisters.  In therapy, the therapist brought up her many concerns regarding Kitty being stranded in another state if she finds herself unable to emotionally cope, and recommended she wait until I was able to go with her to provide emotional support and the ability to take a break.  Kitty immediately forgot about the very serious concerns the therapist brought up, and began talking about staying a 2 months with Biomom.  I asked her to talk to the therapist about it during her next individual session.

Now Kitty is saying 2 years!!  *sigh*  Part of me wants to encourage her to go.  The rest of me knows she would completely lose most of the progress she's made over the last 2 years.

*************************************************
Received a letter from Bear.  He said the becoming a Muslim thing was just a test.  No idea if I passed or not.  Not thrilled at the idea of being tested.  Let him know as much when I wrote back.

Friday, February 14, 2014

Calming/ Relaxation Techniques

I realized I've been talking about calming and relaxation techniques for years, but never gave any details.


FIGHT/ FLIGHT/ FREEZE MODE

An important thing to remember is that when a child is in full meltdown - fight/ flight/ freeze mode the thinking part of their brain is shut down.  Most likely they won't even remember what happened.  Talking, appealing to their better nature/ guilt, providing logical arguments, threatening punishment/ consequences... will NOT work.  

Usually, when my child gets to this point it ends up becoming physical and I might end up restraining/ holding her until she calms down.  Afterward, I usually continue to hold and comfort her, assuring her she is safe and still loved.  This is a good time for real conversation about her emotions and feelings {as is the time right before sleep and after a good workout}.



Only after she's calm does her brain start working again. 

 I usually wait until a later time, when she's in a good state, to talk to her about any consequences or other things I know might trigger her.


I'll be honest, we rarely gave her consequences, especially for what she did in a meltdown because they usually triggered her right back into dysregulation. When she was dysregulated (about 90% of the time), emotionally she was like a toddler, and you don't punish a toddler for throwing a fit, you just calm them down, and childproof a little better in the future (to avoid having to give a lot of "No"s), and move on. {Dealing with Meltdowns and Dysregulation}

For me, not giving consequences is SUPER HARD! because I want to give her consequences and punishments! It helped me to go back and read Beyond Consequences to access my empathy and understanding.



I don't think handling this life is possible without a lot of Self-Care and what I learned about Finding the Joy.

AVOIDING A MELTDOWN

Emotional Age

It helped to discover her developmental emotional age {Chapter 1: Therapeutic Parenting Based on Developmental/ Emotional Age} and start treating her as though she were that age.

To truly change my expectations, I had to develop a mantra, "She's only 6. She's only 6. She's only 6." When I focused on that, I realized a LOT of the meltdowns were because she was overwhelmed. 

{We tried to parent age-appropriately as respectfully as possible. Treating a 15yo like they are 6 is tough - we put off explaining it as long as we could because we knew she wouldn't understand it - Explaining Age-Appropriate Parenting to Your Child}. 


Reduce Stressors 


  • We reduced expectations (like chores). She still had them, but they were simpler. {Chores, Responsibilities, and Other Things My Kids Can't Handle!}
  • Tasks were broken into smaller pieces (only 1 task at a time instead of a series of instructions). 
  • Her room was stripped to a bed, one cuddle toy and maybe a book. 
  • In school, we fought hard to get things less chaotic as well (Safety/ Crisis Plan, no homework, smaller class sizes, avoiding the cafeteria and hallways during passing periods...). 
  • We cocooned. Life was kept as safe and simple as possible. {Why Doesn't My Child Feel Safe?}

Caring Structure
It took me a long time to believe it, but my children actually craved caring structure. {Structure ad Caring Support} Their favorite teacher at school was a behavior staff person who always called them on their behavior - if they were acting like a turd, she said so, bluntly, BUT, unlike the teachers who let them do whatever they wanted, or were super strict, but didn't actually care, my children adored her. Even though their favorite teachers were super strict, the kids knew that they legitimately cared about them. 

When I began providing caring structure, I thought for sure they would rebel and make our lives miserable. They didn't always like it, but it seemed like their few complaints were based on what their peers thought about it, rather than something they were truly feeling. Unlike my neurotypical, biochildren who understandably would have protested the strict structure their adopted siblings required, most of the time, my adopted children just accepted it and moved on.


Without this structure or when we "lightened up," my son would act out until he had to be returned to the stricter structure level. Somewhere deep down, subconsciously, his brain knew he needed that structure to feel Safe. 

Anxiety Scale

One thing that helps us avoid a meltdown is to try to make her environment as low stress as possible – including school. 

A technique we suggested was the Anxiety Scale. Kitty had difficulty with understanding things like number scales.


{"On a scale of 1 to 10 how suicidal are you?" Kitty's reply was a "5" because while she felt like killing herself and had a plan, she didn't actually have the items she needed to carry out her plan. Obviously, the rest of us considered this more like a "9!"} 

So I created a concrete anxiety scale with pictures of cats in different stages of anxiety. Each stage had a number, a brief description of how it might feel, examples of possible causes for that level of anxiety, and s suggested intervention. 



3 – Anxiety annoying enough to be distracting. 
INTERVENTION:  Coping/calming skills still work, but might need outside reminders to use them.
EX:  Loud, chaotic environment.  Quiz you’re prepared for.  Ex-boyfriend standing 15ft away.


4 - Can be ignored if you are really involved; still distracting.  Somatic symptoms (upset stomach, headache...).  
INTERVENTION:  Brief breaks with adult support and assistance using coping/calming skills. Can be redirected back to class.
EX:  People arguing.  Test you're prepared for.  Presenting a well-prepared presentation with a group.

Avoiding Triggers
It's not always possible, but I try to avoid her triggers {Meltdown Triggers} and be especially understanding when she's feeling:


Assisting with Calming Techniques

At one point, Kitty yelled at me for not calming her down.  I remember thinking, "How ridiculous!  She's 18.  She's stable.  It shouldn't be my job to calm her down... oh wait.  It is.  
I took a deep breath, stuffed down my anger and frustration, hitched up my big girl panties, and calmed her down.  Changed the subject, distracted her, and moved on.  Nothing was resolved, but it wasn't going to be anyway. 
{Afterward, I did a LOT of Self-Care so I could keep up my emotional reserves to be able to do this again next time.}

We processed her meltdown a couple of days later in therapy, where she admitted that she's deathly afraid of emotions leading her back to being unstable.  This is why she's been isolating more and more.  She's trying to turn off her emotions.  This is a terrifying life or death feeling for her.  


She blames me for trying to drag her back to the family and not allowing her to shut herself off.  I'm the evil witch who is trying to force her to be unstable.  No, it's not rational.

Many children of trauma are not able to regulate their emotions.  They need parents to help them.  


Self-Regulation

The biggest calming technique I have is to stay calm myself (if I can't then I switch out with Hubby or if he's not available, I try to step back and use calming techniques on myself!).  
I try to speak to her in a calm voice and breathe loudly (slowly and deeply) to see if I can help her regulate (wish I had a Darth Vader mask!). Subconsciously, people will tend to match their breathing and even heart rate to those around them. If you're calm, they become calmer.

Avoiding Escalation is probably the most important tool.  
If I can see her escalating toward a meltdown, and I'm lucky, I can keep her calm enough to avoid a total meltdown.  Sometimes, I can actually get her to do, fix, calm down... about some, if not all, of whatever it is she's upset about.

Generally, I don't think Kitty has control of meltdowns (and I frequently have to remind myself of this), but I also think she has occasionally escalated because in her past if she pitched a big enough fit, she got what she wanted. Each meltdown she had seemed a little more extreme than the last one because we were not giving her her way.  

It was very hard on us, but we had to be consistent in never giving in until she finally realized that it was not going to work. It also meant we had to pick our battles. Before something became a full-on meltdown, we had to decide if it was important enough to stand our ground. 


For example, Biomom had sometimes given Kitty cheesecake for breakfast, but only after Kitty had pitched a big fit and Biomom had given in. Obviously, we agreed with biomom that cheesecake is not a good breakfast food. BUT, it was not a hill I wanted to die on. I saw that my saying "no" was leading to a meltdown and made a quick decision. I told her, 


"You know what? You're right. I've decided to let you have cheesecake for breakfast." 


By stopping the argument before it escalated, I:


  • Avoided a meltdown. 
  • She didn't "win" by pitching a big fit and getting what she wanted so we could continue our efforts to extinguish that belief {This did work by the way! She eventually realized that pitching a bigger and bigger fit wasn't going to get her what she wanted so she quit doing it.}
  • I got to reinforce that I love her and give her good things - which helped with attachment.
I think one slice of cheesecake for breakfast was worth all that.



Time-Ins
Timeouts don't work with our kids because they can trigger abandonment issues. So we use Time-ins. 
Sometimes talking to Kitty (especially with eye contact) just escalates her.  So I try staying near her, but not interacting. 
Unfortunately, sometimes this makes her feel rejected/ abandoned. Sometimes when she storms out, and I don’t go after her, I'm sure she sees it as me not loving her.

Just being around me (or my husband) often triggers her, but rather than leave the room (which sometimes wasn't safe), I used a technique similar to Super Nanny's sleep technique  I'd sit nearby (usually on the other side of the room, sometimes up against the door if she was sitting on the other side holding it shut. I usually grabbed a book to read as a "reason" for not engaging.


I'd breathe slowly (and as loudly as I could) so she would unconsciously mimic my calm breathing.


Disengage

When she tried to engage me (so she could use my response as an excuse to escalate), I would calmly disengage. I wouldn't make eye contact at all, wouldn't even look at her (except maybe out of the corner of my eye to make sure she was being safe). If she said something to me, rather than "ignoring" her, so I'd make short statements like, "I'm sorry you feel that way." or "I'll leave when I'm sure you're safe." Then I'd quickly go back to reading my book.

4 Foot Rule
If she makes threats to herself or others we used the "4 Foot Rule." She knows this is what we do, so I think she does it deliberately sometimes so she feels safer and for the closeness (without having to actually ask for it).  

The "4 Foot Rule" means an adult must be within (approximately) 4 feet of the child at all times (usually just means line-of-sight).  If I know she can't hurt herself (like if she's holding the door shut so can't hurt herself without moving away from the door), I might sit outside the door rather than insist that I be able to see her.

Empathy Not Logic
Example of my probably too logical way to deal with a PRE-meltdown:

Kitty: "There is No way I am EVER going to do my schoolwork."
I calmly sympathized that it is hard and I understand that she doesn't like it, but it has to be done.

Kitty: "You're an idiot if you think I'm going to do any schoolwork again and you can't make me." 
I admit I got a little frustrated at this point and spoke firmly about calling me names. I warned her that if she didn't do her school work, she would go to work with me... where she would have to do schoolwork. She calmed down a little, so I was able to switch back to "nurturing mode." I told her that she can't drop out of school (it's illegal) and that she didn't want to be 14 and still in 5th or 6th grade.

Kitty: "I'm going to go emo."
I hear this a lot and she knows how I feel about it. I told her that I would have to assume that someone/ something was having a negative influence on her that I would start taking away TV shows, makeup, music...

Kitty: "You hate me. You don't care about me. I'm going to crawl in a box and not eat. You want me to be in a box and die."
I told her I love her even if she doesn't believe that right now. That she can only know how she feels, not how I feel. I also reminded her that if I didn't love her I wouldn't care if she was in a box.

It was hard to remain empathetic and nurturing when what I really wanted to do was point out the flaws in her reasoning and give her logical, rational arguments as to why what she was saying wasn't true. Obviously, I struggle with this, as evidenced by my replies. *sigh* I'm still working on this.

Get Moving/ Eat
I let her go outside to walk/stalk for 10 minutes but told her she then needed to come back in and do 3 pages of math and of word-building (her school uses workbooks that have relatively simple pages so this wasn't as much work as it sounds. 

She had a snack then went outside. She came back in to verify with me that she only had to do 6 pages and then she was done for the day. I said no. When she was done with the six pages we would talk. She did the 6 pages.

Success! No meltdown. No regression to fight, flight, or freeze mode. AND some actual schoolwork done!

[Now I no longer address homework at all. I've decided that attachment is waaaayyyy more important than an education. There's time for education later. Think about it. Would you rather have a well-educated sociopath? More here about how we got "no homework" put into her IEP - School!}


Ways to AVOID meltdowns:
  • Parenting Based on Emotional/ Developmental Age It's very important to remember that kids with trauma are usually developmentally socially/ emotionally much younger than their chronological age
  • Reduce Responsibilities and Expectations 
    Tasks need to be broken down into smaller steps given one at a time until the child can handle more. Chores and other responsibilities should be based on emotional age rather than physical age. 
  • Safe Environment Structured with consistently, enforced rules helps, but remember it's perceived safety - which is different for kids of trauma 
  • Structure and Caring Support
    Our kids usually need more structure than their peers. This is tough! to provide but it makes a HUGE difference for them.
  • Consistent, Caring Caregivers
    Providing loving structure. This requires caregivers to do lots of self-care to keep up their emotional reserves. 
  • Frequent, Gentle Reminders to stay focused and on task
    This can be just using the child's name at the beginning of a sentence.
  • Monitor her Stress Levels and cue her to take a break
    We had trouble with getting the school to help with this. One proposed option was the Anxiety Scale.
  • Staff (and parents!) Trained in Stress Management/ Relaxation Techniques
  • Predictable Routine 
  • Social Skills Training 
  • Self-Confidence Building Activities and Training 
  • Provide Goals for Self-Management of Stress and Anxiety  This was something we had to work toward because she is unable to access these skills independently when she is actively stressed and anxious - although she responds well to cueing by someone when she is starting to escalate.


1. “Can you draw it?”
Drawing, painting or doodling about an anxiety provides kids with an outlet for their feelings when they can’t use their words.
2.  “I love you. You are safe.”
Being told that you will be kept safe by the person you love the most is a powerful affirmation. Remember, anxiety makes your children feel as if their minds and bodys are in danger. Repeating they are safe can soothe the nervous system.
3. “Let’s pretend we’re blowing up a giant balloon. We’ll take a deep breath and blow it up to the count of 5.”
If you tell a child to take a deep breath in the middle of a panic attack, chances are you’ll hear, “I CAN’T!” Instead, make it a game. Pretend to blow up a balloon, making funny noises in the process. Taking three deep breaths and blowing them out will actually reverse the stress response in the body and may even get you a few giggles in the process.

Other Calming Techniques:


Deep breathing - slow, deep, even breaths from the diaphragm, rather than short, shallow breaths from the chest. Can try counting - especially if trying to go to sleep. 
- Get comfortable and relax muscles.
- Inhale deeply and hold it.
- Exhale and repeat.
- Try adding stretching.

EFT Emotional Freedom Techniques (aka Tapping).  This can be a full tapping routine or just something simple like a side hand chop.

Mantra (can be used with tapping) - Choose a positive, calming word or phrase. Repeat it over and over to yourself silently to prevent distracting thoughts from entering and calm yourself.

Brain Gym – exercises that cross the mid-brain.  EMDR works in similar ways.  I do a variation of these with Kitty.  Sometimes it's just rubbing her back from side to side (crossing the mid-brain).  Sometimes I can talk her into tapping herself (like patting her left knee or upper arm and then her right, over and over), but she finds it embarrassing and most of the time we've missed the window where she can access calming techniques for herself.

Exercise - Going for a walk or run, yoga, jumping on a trampoline to clear the mind and reduce stress.

Distraction/ Redirection - Find a different activity or something to focus on that distracts from an event that is causing stress.  Lots of ideas in this post about the Attachment Challenge.
- Read a book or magazine.
- Listen to relaxing music or watch a video.
- Do a crossword puzzle, or play an electronic game.
- Make cookies.
- Play with playdoh
- Try lying down and taking a nap.
- Go somewhere in your imagination.
- Cocooning (create a cozy, womb-like area with books and soft toys).
TRE Tension & Trauma Releasing Exercises  - this intrigues me, but I haven't tried it.

Biofeedback/ Neurofeedback – training in how to calm the body and brain.  

Mindfulness - staying focused and in the present moment.
- Take a break and make yourself acutely aware of your surroundings.
- Take deep breaths and feel your lungs swell.
- Allow yourself to think about your feelings, but do so without judgment.


Flooding - a type of exposure treatment, often used for treating phobias - which is basically what the Attachment Challenge does.  Hugs cause Kitty's nervous system to instinctively flood.  Flooding involves immersing the person in the fear reflex until the fear itself fades away.

Kitty's therapist recommended something more like Counter-conditioning* instead of hugs and pressured attachment activities with extended eye contact (which is also very hard for Kitty).  We'd change it to her sitting next to me on the couch while we watch TV and I put my hands on her shoulders (eventually working up to pressure on her upper arms and neck), plus warmth and light pressure on her lower back (fingers in line with her lower rib cage) which affects her kidneys.  Kitty isn't happy about it, but she agrees it's better than the way we were doing it.

*Counter-conditioning - (Watson, 1924). In this form, one is trained to substitute a relaxation response for the fear response in the presence of the phobic stimulus. Relaxation is incompatible with feeling fearful or having anxiety, so it is said that the relaxation response counters the fear response. This counter-conditioning is most often used in a systematic way to very gradually introduce the feared stimulus in a step-by-step fashion known as systematic desensitization, first used by Joseph Wolpe (1958). This desensitization involves three steps:
(1) training the patient to physically relax,
(2) establishing an anxiety hierarchy of the stimuli involved, and
(3) counter-conditioning relaxation as a response to each feared stimulus beginning first with the least anxiety-provoking stimulus and moving then to the next least anxiety-provoking stimulus until all of the items listed in the anxiety hierarchy have been dealt with successfully.


Article: Some really good tips for helping children deal with anxiety.


Books

Making Empathy Books

Angry Octopus: An Anger Management Story introducing active progressive muscular relaxation and deep breathing by Lori Lite

Angry Octopus is a story that teaches children how to use progressive muscle relaxation and breathing techniques to calm down, lower stress, and control anger. Children relate to the angry octopus in this story as the sea child shows the octopus how to take a deep breath, calm down, and manage his anger. 
Children learn to unwind, relax, and control anger with this fun exercise known as progressive muscle relaxation. Children relate to the angry octopus in this story as the sea child shows him how to take a deep breath, calm down, and manage his anger. These effective stress and anger management techniques for children focus awareness on various muscle groups to create a complete resting of the mind and body. Progressive muscle relaxation can be used to lower stress, decrease pain, and manage anger. 
This engaging story quiets the mind and relaxes the body so your child can let go of anger, relax, and fall asleep peacefully. This story is longer making it ideal for older children or those with a longer attention span. 
Note to Parent: Angry Octopus is a kid favorite. Parents report that their children use the techniques in the story to calm themselves and also remind their parents to use the same technique. This story received national attention on ABC’s Shark Tank. Every child has a different emotional maturity, attention span, and need. While the stories are best suited for ages 6-12, do not let this be your primary reason for selecting. You know your child best and remember this is not about the reading level. The focus is on the actual techniques.

Other posts:

Handling Child Stress

Wednesday, January 8, 2014

Bear Update

Been awhile since I updated on Bear.  Not a lot of great news.


  • At "A & R" Bear was finally assessed and put on medication.  Unfortunately the wrong one, because Elavil can cause mania in people with bipolar disorder.  He had severe "gastrointestinal issues" and they took him off of it.  Unfortunately they didn't put him back on anything.  
  • They also offered him Thorazine – which D refused to take as he'd seen a lot of people taking it acting like zombies.
  • Bear was moved to one of the scarier private prisons and he's pretty scared.  
  • The good news is that the new location is only about a 10 hour round trip from our house.  The bad news is that makes it feel worse when we still can't visit.
  • According to Bear, there's a race war between the Native Americans and the Hispanics, so Bear has aligned himself with the Native Americans.  I wish he'd stay out of all of it, but I assume it helps him feel safer.
  • We haven't been able to communicate with him much, because until a bunk opened up in a regular cell block, he was stuck in, I think he called it segregation.  Now he's finally got a regular bunk.
  • He is asking me to advocate for him and get him moved to another cell block and/or another prison, plus he wants me to fight to get him on meds.  I don't think I can help, but he seems to think I'm Super Advocate!
  • Bear is struggling more and more with the lack of medications, but despite his repeated requests, he hadn't been able to see a psychiatrist until he "flipped out" recently.  Unfortunately they chose to put him on Trazadone for sleep and Prozac.  Prozac is an anti-depressant, which for someone with bipolar disorder can trigger mania.  In Kitty it triggered self-harming.  A manic Bear was angry and aggressive.  Very scary!
  • Bear had told us he was up for parole at the end of January, but he recently told us that he was mistaken and won't be eligible for parole until December of this year.
  • He's decided he wants to be Muslim and has asked me to buy him a Quran.  If I thought this was a genuine decision based on sincere beliefs and information, I would be supportive.  Instead I believe this is like Kitty becoming Wiccan while in residential treatment, just because her roommate had decided to try it and they were into teenage romance novels loosely based on Wiccan principles.  I'm not sure why it bothers me so much, but it does.

Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Holiday (aka Traumaversaries) Trauma Tips - Updated

Holiday (aka Traumaversaries) Trauma Tips 

Between scary creatures and a sugar rush on Halloween, the start of many schedule changes with Daylight Savings Time, family gatherings on Thanksgiving stirring up feelings about family members not present (including bio), and feeling judged to see if you’re naughty or nice… there is no shortage of potential trauma and upset during the holiday season.  For parents of children with trauma and special needs, this holiday season can create significant disruption and spark some serious trouble.

“Around here we usually hold our breath in October and don’t exhale until January,” says Barbara Streett, a parent of one special needs child, 10, and two neurotypical kids, 7 and 5, respectively.  “If it’s not one thing at this time of year, it’s most definitely another.”

This is a great article about why our children act the way they do on holidays. The following is a paraphrased excerpt from this article:
WHY: Adopted children have been abandoned causing deep shame and feelings of being unlovable and unworthiness of anything good. This has nothing to do with the reality that they are now in a safe, loving family. So they sabotage to gain control of what they know will be inevitable disappointment and if they trigger us into anger then it just validates their beliefs. 
WHY: "Big Days trigger Big Feelings. No matter the extreme (good or bad), it is all INTENSE and triggering." 
WHY: Holidays rarely have routine or structure and they are full of expectations and surprises (what is in the package? did she get something better than me? will I get what I desperately want? can I handle that?). The stress is overwhelming and scary! Children react to feeling unsafe by going in to fight/ flight or freeze mode (meltdowns, shut downs, attempting to totally control the situation which is impossible...). 
 WHY: "Big Days are a reminder of what should have been but wasn’t, all that was lost, all that will never be."
TIPS:
  • Limit the "runway." Downplay the hype and discussions of  expectations as much as possible. Avoid things like decorating for Christmas as long as possible. Not letting a child know you are leaving for a trip until the day before or even the day of prevents them angsting over it and sabotaging it.
  • KISS - Keep it simple! Keep things as lowkey as possible, don't make elaborate plans, instead schedule lots of downtime and avoid overwhelming/ overstimulating situations whenever possible (like shopping or parties). 
  • "We cast simple, manageable vision for Big Days: this is what we’ll do, this is who will be there, this is what we won’t be doing, this is about how long it will last."
  • Use calming techniques when you see a child getting overwhelmed or ramping up. 
  • Acknowledge and talk about the child's "Big Feelings." "We assure them that whether they get a handle on it or not, they could not possibly make us love them less, and if the worst thing that happens is they have a bad day, then no big deal."
  • Remember that we as parents are human too! "We’ll just keep working, keep trying, keep loving, and keep forgiving ourselves when it all goes sideways. You are not alone, know that." 
Christine Moers says one of the most important things to remember, "YOU CAN'T LOSE CHRISTMAS!"
 "Trauma has jacked with the brains of our kids. In a stressful moment/week/season they get stuck in a part of their brain that was meant to only be visited on occasion, in extreme circumstances. Our kids also find themselves regressed emotionally and developmentally in those times. They can be, quite literally, a three-year-old in a 12-year-old body. 
Imagine a three year old kicking and biting and hitting two days before Christmas. Throwing toys and scratching up the family dining room set. Having a massive tantrum. Would we take Christmas away? Nope. That's crazy talk. A three year old cannot understand the magnitude of what they're doing when they feel out of control. We would redirect in the moment. When they are calm, we would reconnect with them and give them an opportunity to do the same. That is how we heal and guide young children. Our kids need the exact same thing. There is a reason they do these crazy things that are just so beyond description. They are camped in a part of their brain that wanted to kick them out long ago. 
Family celebrations and holidays are an opportunity to imprint into their minds and hearts: you are a part of this family. Period. Finito. You can never lose that. "
The challenges associated with holidays like Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas and New Year’s can be overwhelming for a family with special needs, but with preparation and awareness of the individual family member’s needs it can be done!

A few minor tweaks to holiday rituals can go a long way.
  • Instead of big family gatherings with lots of expectations, try downsizing!
  • Instead of big family gatherings, try spacing out visits with one or two relatives at a time.  Have some quiet activities for the child in case they become overwhelmed.
  • Try to stick closely to your child’s usual schedule - regular nap time, bedtime and meal times are important! 
  • If you are visiting, try sending family members a letter beforehand with some suggestions about how to make the child feel most comfortable (See appendix for sample letter.)
  • Set up a safe place in the house for your child to go if he or she just wants to be alone.  Stock this place with a few soft toys, a quiet activity or two and some books, maybe an MP3 player filled with soothing music.

    If you decide to travel, here’s a few tips: 
  • Take electronic gadgets AND the chargers.  There are inexpensive converters that can be plugged into your car allowing you to charge items that normally plug into the wall or even USB.
  • A personal DVD player or laptop stocked with movies and/or games.
  • Pack a personal back pack for child with new dollar store items, include a few favorite toys, pencils, snacks etc.  
  • A bag with new or rarely used items – like travel games and snacks, that can be introduced at various intervals throughout the trip.
  • Small heavy blanket, for sensory kids.
  • Travel pillow and soft toy/lovey.
  • Headphones.
  • Ask flight attendants and hotel about accommodation’s available to make your trip a family success.
  • Plan for frequent stops to move around (look for places with playgrounds).  Think about traveling at night, but if you travel during the day, try to stick as closely as possible to routines – especially mealtimes and bedtime.
  • Medications.
  • Visual pencil box for travel and helping child understand sequence of events.  These are simple pictures, stored in a pencil box, with Velcro dots on each picture.  The box has 3-4 Velcro dots (the soft side of the Velcro) on the outside.  Pictures are placed on the box so the child understands the order of activities.  For example: a suitcase (to show packing), a car, food (to show will eat lunch), then a picture of the destination (ex. Grandma’s).
  • Think about putting your child in respite and going without him/her! Just be sure it's not treated as a punishment for the child (it can be a low-key fun time with a family friend or relative). Trips can be just too overwhelming for some kids and can ruin the experience for everyone else.  "Re-entry" (coming back from time away from your child) can be super hard, but if it gives you some respite and a chance to recharge then most trauma mamas agree the re-entry meltdowns are worth it.

Remember, every child is different, and there is no flow chart for how this works.  The overarching goal: Be flexible, and remember that no tradition is more important than the comfort and happiness of your kids.

Holidays are supposed to be special times for the whole family.  Most of us grow up expecting them to be memorable and fun.  When we have children, we experience these dreams and expectations even more acutely.  It’s perfectly natural, then, to experience an emotional roller coaster when presented with the challenge of navigating holidays with a child with special needs.  One key to managing this inevitably frustrating situation is learning to let go.  Set realistic expectations and be flexible.

“You have to be willing to modify certain traditions, or forget them all together,” says Barbara Streett, parent of a child with autism. “What you want or envision may not be the best thing for your child, so you have to change your plan accordingly.”


  • Holidays are about the kids, but a successful holiday doesn’t have to look like a Norman Rockwell painting to make the kids happy.
  • Remind yourself that it’s OK to let go of certain traditions that just won’t work… for now.
  • Allow yourself to be frustrated and anxious; there’s no shame in that.  When you feel frustrations welling up, take a step back and focus on what you’re doing.
  • Frequently remind your child that there is nothing they can do to lose Christmas.  This is frequently such a source of anxiety for children that they sabotage it rather than take that chance.  In the long run this “naughty” behavior will usually stop as the anxiety decreases.
  • Remember what your child’s “currency” is and use that to interact with him or her.
  • Streett is careful to add that especially at holiday time, the definition of a family meal should also be flexible.  “If your child doesn’t want to eat with everybody else, that needs to be OK; if the child needs to take a break, let him go,” she says. “The sooner you stop fighting the fact that these kinds of traditions must be set in stone, the more enjoyable the holiday will be.”
  • If your child tends to destroy gifts (very common when they don’t feel they deserve gifts or for now aren’t able to accept what they mean).  Try inexpensive gifts from the dollar store. The bigger the better.

At our house (2 siblings adopted as teens from foster care and 2 neurotypical biochildren), we realized our children were overwhelmed by the holidays so we started simplifying things with some new traditions:

Halloween - Children of trauma can be both attracted and triggered by the gore and scary fantasy associated with Halloween (not to mention the sugar rush!).  I love Halloween, but my kids just couldn't handle it.  We chose to turn off the porch light and have a small family Halloween party.  We ordered pizza and soda (a special treat), and I bought each child a bag of their favorite kind of snack size candy that was just for them (explained as, "This way you don't get a bunch of stuff you didn't like!"), made Halloween shaped sugar cookies they could decorate themselves, and watched a non-triggering Halloween movie (usually the "made for TV" Disney movies).  As they got a little better about handling the holiday, we left the porch light on and the kids took turns handing out treats to the little Trick or Treaters.  When they hit their tweens and young teens we dressed up and did a quick trick or treating walk of the block as a family.  They were allowed to have one or two friends join us afterward for a small Halloween party.  By their late teens they were told they were "too old" for Trick or Treating, and we went back to having a small party and handing out treats.

Our Christmas Traditions  For us, Christmas is very low key. We have traditions which seems to help anxiety levels, because the kids know what is coming next (helps them feel safer).
Jesus' birthday cake

Jesus’ Birthday party – To alleviate some of the building of stress and anxiety of waiting for Christmas and change the focus from the gifts, we celebrate Jesus’ birth on Christmas Eve with a birthday cake and Jesus gifts, which are similar to New Year’s Eve resolutions (everyone writes on a piece of paper what they are going to give Jesus this year, usually something we think he would want us to do – like spend more time with the family or give more time to those less fortunate.  Each person can choose to read theirs aloud and then we put the paper on the tree. Then we read last year’s gifts and see how we did. Afterward we all eat birthday cake (helps my antsy ones sit through this, knowing there's cake when it's done!).

Christmas Eve presents -  Before bed we open our Christmas Eve gift - usually a pair of PJs, and a book or stuffed toy – depending on the child’s age.  This helps the younger children wait (and makes sure everyone looks nice for pictures in the morning!

Three Gifts - A few years ago we decided to start only giving 3 gifts to the kids on Christmas morning. (It was good enough for Jesus!). It has helped me out in many ways (the kids are not quite as fond of it).  Usually at least two of the three gifts that the children get are “themed” gifts. So it’s more than one item in the package.  The cost of the gift seems to be largely unimportant – the most envied (meltdown inducing) gift was a box of highlights that one daughter got and the other (RAD) daughter didn’t.
• Taken some of the focus off of gifts and put it back on the “reason for the season.”
• Reduced some of the pressure to get the exact same number and equivalent gifts for each of my 4 children (I remember my sisters and I counting gifts on Christmas Eve – cost wasn’t as important).
• Decreased the clutter. My adopted children can’t handle too much stuff in their rooms or lives.
• Reduced the cost! Christmas is expensive enough with 4 kids.
• Made shopping easier. It’s HARD to find presents for teenage boys (assuming that like us you do not want to buy expensive electronic stuff he’s only going to break or lose anyway and/or can’t handle).
• Less wrapping!
• Less time sitting watching everyone open presents (better for my kids with ADHD).

Scarlet Claus
Santa - My biokids (7 and 10) still believed in Santa when the older kids (11 and 13) came in to our home the month before Christmas. We made it very clear to all the kids that if they said they didn't believe in Santa then Santa wouldn't bring them presents. My insistence that Santa is real (HE IS!) caused some issues with Kitty, because she decided that made me a liar). Santa used to bring the best present, but we changed that approach when we realized we didn't want him getting all the credit! We wanted the kids to know that we were supplying the gifts that said, "We know you, we love you and we are giving you these things because we want to show you how we feel." Santa still brought stocking gifts (although the kids knew we added to those), but he started bringing "family presents" - gifts for the whole family to enjoy rather than for each child. Over the years, Santa has brought, a dog (a red husky named Scarlet Claus), a big screen TV, a Wii, a Clearplay DVD player with a bunch of movies they hadn't previously been allowed to watch...



Helpful websites:
Top Toys for children with special needs:  http://www.abilitypath.org/tools-resources/links--resources/abilitypath_holidaysurvivalguideforparentswithspecialneeds_2010.pdf

Modelmekids.com - Model Me Kids® videos demonstrate social skills by modeling peer behavior at school, on a playdate, at a birthday party, on the playground, at a library, at the dentist, restaurant, and more. Designed as a teaching tool for children, adolescents, and teenagers with Autism, Asperger Syndrome, and developmental delays, the videos are used by teachers, parents, and therapists. Real children model each skill.

Autismapps.com



Sample Holiday Visit Letter – Adapted from http://www.abilitypath.org article –
Holiday Survival Guide for Parents with Special Needs

Dear Family and Friends:

We look forward to seeing everyone for the holidays. I can’t wait to see everyone and celebrate
together. Before we gather this year, I would like to share with you about ______________ and let you know how you can support him and our family.

My son is loving, kind, and very affectionate. He loves to talk about his siblings, ______________
and ______________, and camping. He likes to play Candyland, Legos, and with his iPod.
He also has (attachment disorder/ autism/ sensory integration disorder...).

Holidays are a time of year that ______________ looks forward to. However, the extended
family and friends, decorations, and festive noises that the holiday brings can be frightening
and/or overwhelming for him. They also cause him anxiety because there are so many new things
happening that are different from his routine.  He is hypervigilant about new situations, and it reminds him of traumatic things from his past.  Please understand that this is not about his feelings about you or me.

______________ may need a quiet place to retreat to take in everything presented to him in this new and different environment.  Please have a quiet room available for ______________ so that he can have time to himself to process everything. This room should be off limits to everyone but ______________ and me (mom). ______________ is used to routine and all these changes can cause anxiety. Once ______________ can regroup, he may be OK to return. However, if something changes, we may need to leave suddenly.   Also, although we love being with family, we will need to leave at __pm to allow ____________ to stick as closely to his normal bedtime routine as possible.  Please support us in this.  It is very necessary to his well being.

______________  or I may appear bossy and controlling. This is to help him cope. ___________ needs structure, and often things have to be done in a way he is familiar with or else he may get stressed and frustrated. This does not mean you have to change the way you are doing things--just please be patient with ______________, and look to me (mom) to redirect this behavior.

People with (attachment disorder/trauma/ autism/ sensory integration disorder...) often have certain behaviors to help themselves feel more comfortable and safe. ______________  is not trying to be disruptive or defiant; he is doing this to regulate himself in his surroundings. Please be respectful of these behaviors and look to me (mom) on how to handle this.

_____________ often needs to get up and walk around (maybe even go to his quiet room) to regulate himself.   I ask that you not give this a lot of attention and continue eating and conversing.

Please do not be critical of mine or my husband’s parenting skills. Remember that ____________ needs to be watched more closely than most children are his age. Like all parents, we do our best but are not perfect. Holidays are filled with new sights, sounds, and smells packed into a busy and often frantic household with a big tree plopped down in the middle of it. It is very hard work to incorporate (attachment disorder/trauma/ autism/ sensory integration disorder...) into this. I said it was hard – but it can be done. We have been doing this for ____ years, and although it is not perfect, it works for us.

We are excited to share this holiday experience with you and look forward to seeing you,

Saturday, December 14, 2013

Response to an Anonymous Comment

"How can Kitty even be expected to attach to you when you spend so much time disparaging her? Didn't you once blog that your husband curses at her and calls her names? How is that in any way "theraputic"?
Every idea Kitty has, you shoot down and mock.
You constantly talk about Kitty's mental age but I don't know any actual good parents treat ten year olds the way you treat Kitty, typical or otherwise.
How is what you do attachment parenting?
I've been reading your blog for years and the way you depict it, your home seems quite unsafe for Kitty.
Your depiction makes it seem that you are forcing yourself on her to no avail whatsoever with little to no positive results. Isn't that the definition of insanity?
Your "Fair Club" seems UNfair and not based in any kind of science or reality, especially when it is only used sporadically at your own whim.
People feel sorry for Kitty because like it or not, your description of your parenting appears abusive, infrequent and unsafe.
All I can think is that Kitty must spend much of her life bewildered and frightened, a prisoner of your slap-dash, unbalanced "parenting". Your blog is a testament to that."

Wow, this was a particularly harsh comment.  I will address each part:

"How can Kitty even be expected to attach to you when you spend so much time disparaging her?"
-- I certainly don't spend all my time disparaging her!  This blog is my place to vent. I do speak up if it will effect her future (like choosing classes that won't help her with her future), but other than that I keep my opinions to myself around Kitty.

"Didn't you once blog that your husband curses at her and calls her names? How is that in any way "theraputic"?"
--No, I didn't blog that.  You must be thinking of someone else.  Over the years my husband may have said something not very nice to her a few times, and he's not always totally empathetic, but would never curse at her and call her names!  We rarely curse or call each other names in this household.

"Every idea Kitty has, you shoot down and mock."
-- I do get frustrated with Kitty's unrealistic expectations, and that's what I talk about a lot on here, but if it makes a difference, I don't mock her to her face.

"You constantly talk about Kitty's mental age but I don't know any actual good parents treat ten year olds the way you treat Kitty, typical or otherwise."
-- First of all, Kitty is 10 in a lot of ways, but definitely not in all ways, and one of the most important ways she's different is that she is a "child of trauma."  I try to parent her where she is, and I use the age "10" as a starting point, but the truth is I can never parent her like I would a typical 10yo.  Talking about her emotional age is more about helping me remember that she's not really 18 and remembering to parent her accordingly.
The main thing is therapeutic parenting is very different than "regular" parenting.  It's not intuitive.  I doesn't look like "good parenting,"  It is what my kids need.  Yes, I make mistakes.  There is no Dummy's Guide on how to parent Kitty or kids like her.  If you know of a book or resource that tells me how to be a "good parent" to her then I'd be happy to read it.  I'm doing the best I can.

"How is what you do attachment parenting?"
-- Kitty is attached now, although because of her history probably still "anxiously."  I don't really do attachment parenting anymore, just therapeutic parenting.  If you want a good description of therapeutic parenting check out Christine Moers' DVD - Chaos to Healing:  Therapeutic Parenting 101, Katharine Leslie, Daniel Hughes, Denise Best, the Beyond Consequences books

"I've been reading your blog for years and the way you depict it, your home seems quite unsafe for Kitty."
-- I guess I don't express myself in my blog as well as I'd hoped.  My home is not unsafe for Kitty, or any of my children.  If my posts come across that way then it's because I'm not making it clear that most of my blog is venting and letting other parents going through similar issues know that there is no such thing as "perfect parenting" (and to share resources).  If you're really worried then try to comfort yourself with the fact that I have access to amazing, experienced therapeutic parents and lots of resources, and that Kitty (and therefore myself) is under the direct supervision of her therapist, psychiatrist, a special school for emotionally disturbed children...

"Your depiction makes it seem that you are forcing yourself on her to no avail whatsoever with little to no positive results. Isn't that the definition of insanity?"
-- Yes, that is the definition of insanity; however, I believe the only alternative is to give up on her, and I'm not OK with that.  I have to have hope.

"Your "Fair Club" seems UNfair and not based in any kind of science or reality, especially when it is only used sporadically at your own whim."
-- The FAIR Club is a combination of the many different parenting methods I've used and/or read about over the years.  It is designed to be used with both my neurotypical and not neurotypical kids.  It is definitely not perfect and probably time to update it, but I've never found any other discipline method that worked any better.  I've never claimed it would work for every child or parent, and often when people ask me how to use it, after asking lots of questions about their child, most of the time, we find that their child is developmentally too young or don't have the cognitive abilities to be able to use it completely.  Like every other parenting method, I hope that parents take what works for them and leave the rest.
We don't really use the FAIR Club anymore.  Not because it doesn't work, not because it's at my "whim," but because my kids haven't needed it.  Kitty lives a version of it daily because she needs the structure and support.  The other kids, Ponito and Bob rarely require much discipline anymore.  Coincidentally, we actually used the FAIR Club for the first time in years with Ponito earlier this week (post coming).

"People feel sorry for Kitty because like it or not, your description of your parenting appears abusive, infrequent and unsafe.
All I can think is that Kitty must spend much of her life bewildered and frightened, a prisoner of your slap-dash, unbalanced "parenting". Your blog is a testament to that."
-- Kitty came to us "bewildered and frightened" 7 years ago, imprisoned in a scary world she didn't make and had no control over.  Obviously this couldn't have had anything to do with my parenting, since I was not her parent.  Over the years we have worked hard to become the parents Kitty needs and to help her find new ways to cope and trust, and we're working on helping her accept her limitations (denying that she has any means that she feels it's her fault when she fails) and find ways to work around them.
I think the fact that she's attached to us and trusts us to the best of her ability, that she finally has access to and control of her feelings (physical and emotional), has processed some of her trauma, is properly diagnosed and medicated, has been out of the hospital and residential treatment and been stable for almost 2 years, is graduating high school, has maintained a job (even if I don't think it's the right one for her), no longer hates her siblings and grandparents - hasn't called them evil in years, rarely threatens violence or vengeance on others, rarely has meltdowns for that matter - even when asked to do chores which used to be a huge trigger for her!, will accept hugs from me and actually cares how I feel...
          ................ I think all that is a "testament" to my parenting and her hard work.  You can think I'm a bad parent, but you're wrong.
All I can say is that you don't live in my home, and this blog contains only what I intermittently choose to share here (which admittedly hasn't been much lately).  You'll have to take my word for it that I parent to the best of my ability and that's pretty darn good if I do say so myself.  This is not an easy path and Kitty has a LOT of issues that make her very difficult to parent 24/7, but she's come a really long way.  Maybe that's in spite of my parenting, and maybe there is someone out there who could do a better job of it, but I'm Kitty's mom and they aren't here.

"This sounds like a way for you to get your hands on Kitty's SS money.
Honestly, how do you live with yourself?"
Yes, we would be taking the majority of Kitty's SSI money.
1. If we didn't she would lose! her SSI benefits, because she can't accumulate more than a miniscule amount. Rent is a legitimate expense for SSI.
2. We're not rich. I haven't been able to work for many years because the kids need so much supervision, and when Kitty graduates high school she'll need even more supervision, because she won't be working. We need her income to contribute to the family. If/when she moves out either I'll go back to work, or we'll move to a smaller house.
3. We fully intend to save some of this money for her so that eventually she can use it to pay deposits and such if she ends up living on her own, or for "extras" if she ends up living in an assisted living situation.

"How do you live with yourself?" I'm fine with myself, because I know your judgment is inaccurate.


If you want to share your name and share your blog (or write one) about what an amazing parent you are to your kids who I assume are exactly like mine, then I'd be very happy to read it and respect any constructive criticism you may offer; however, until and unless you are walking in my shoes then please don't criticize me or presume to judge what makes me a good or bad parent.

Sincerely,
Mary

Monday, November 25, 2013

Common Comment Response

**************************************************************

I wanted to address one of the comments I receive a lot.

"If I was Kitty I would want to move out to get away from you." 

Yes, what you see on my blog does appear controlling and restrictive.  There's several reasons for that:

  • I think people are projecting their own feelings or experiences on my children.  Yes, as adults or older teens being treated like a child would be demeaning and feel controlling.  I remember how I felt as teen, ready to get out on my own and try new things.  My mom was pretty strict and protective, and I wanted to rebel from that.  I lived in a big city and I look back now and realize how much my mom's rules protected me.  I had so many friends who got raped, pregnant, dropped out of school...  That being said, I did rebel against some of the rules, and I dealt with the consequences - which luckily weren't too severe.  I think how I parent 17yo Bob and even 14yo Ponito (which I don't talk about much on this blog, since it's not about neurotypical teens), shows that I can parent teens well.  HOWEVER!!!  Kitty is NOT an older teen!!
  • Kitty is at best age 10.  Yes, she gets jealous of the privileges her neurotypical siblings have, what little sister doesn't?   This doesn't mean those privileges are right for her.  RAD behaviors and teenage rebellion/ independence LOOK alike but they are NOT.  Kitty will not be moving out, because 10 year olds expect to have this kind of structure and support.  She may not always like it, but deep down she knows we love her and she doesn't want to leave, just like any other young child.  It is not appropriate or in Kitty or Bear's best interest to parent them like I would a child of their chronological age.   
  • I've been burned before.  I do base some of my responses on our prior experiences.  Honestly, we bowed to pressure a lot with Bear and gave him more freedom than he could handle, and he felt abandoned because of it!   He NEEDS structure and support and when we didn't provide it, he assumed it was because we didn't want to, instead of realizing it meant we were trusting him!  I think he was afraid to admit that he needed the structure and love, so he found ways to force us to give it to him!  I have become more structured, because I know it's what is needed and I'm learning to trust my instincts.
  • I know I tend to overplan and overthink things.  {I also tend to use more words than less!  ;) }  I like to have at least an outline of a plan, which I really am OK with changing.   I try to use this blog (and other resources) as a sounding board.  This blog is often where I experiment and "talk things through" before implementing them.  Although it usually hurts {a LOT} to hear, you guys give me some good feedback, and I listen. Sometimes I change my mind, sometimes I tweak things, and other times I stick with my first instinct. 

Senior Year IEP Results

Before the IEP meeting, we met with Kitty's special school principal and a teacher whose job it is to work on transitions.  Honestly it was the usual joke.  What do you want to be when you grow up?  Where do you want to live?  What do you need (in the 6 months left of school) to reach those goals?

Kitty's answers:  She thinks she wants to take a year off before starting junior college to travel.  She wants to become a flight attendant for awhile so she can travel, but she refused {as much as she will refuse any adult that's not us} to research the job requirements.  She'll stay at home while she goes to college, but eventually she wants to get married and have children.  She wants to continue working at GAC.

The special school principal did mention to her that she might be staying at GAC, because she doesn't like change.  He reinforced that it's a good idea to stay at home for awhile, and stated they will be helping her research the job requirements for being a flight attendant.

The main thing he said is that us making Kitty quit GAC would not get her what we were looking for - which was for the school to find a new job for her.  The vocational program would just drop her.  At the meeting, it was agreed that Kitty would work with her vocational teacher to try to get afternoon hours at GAC, but if not, then the school would fill the time with electives.  After having time to think about it, I'm hoping that she doesn't get the afternoon hours so she can try to get a little more out of these last 6 months of school.  She has the rest of her life to work.  I wanted her to try something new, and since she won't...

So nothing has really changed, except for some reason Hubby mentioned letting her start looking into getting her learner's permit.  That's ALL she got from the meeting.

The actual IEP meeting was a rubber stamp.