This blog is my place to vent and share resources with other parents of children of trauma. I try to be open and honest about my feelings in order to help others know they are not alone. Therapeutic parenting of adopted teenagers with RAD and other severe mental illnesses and issues (plus "neurotypical" teens) , is not easy, and there are time when I say what I feel... at the moment. We're all human!

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Full of Poo

This was a draft from a couple of weeks ago.  Since this Kitty's physical health issues have improved somewhat.  Every time we go in though they find something new, but nothing that explains all her symptoms.


  • Double vision and dizziness - started about a month ago.  Still has it, but claims she's just going to "get used to it."
  • Passed out once or twice. - claimed to anyway.
  • Intermittent vomiting.  Vomited on a Sunday, Thursday, Friday, Sunday and then nothing.  Probably not a lot, and no more than twice a day
  • Side pains - intermittent
  • Anorexia - says she's not hungry and refuses to eat.  Started not long after the doctor mentioned this was a symptom of appendicitis she didn't have, but the doc also changed her meds.
  • Congestion/ Constipation - chronic
  • Right eye not tracking correctly

She's currently diagnosed with:

  • Sinus infection/ bacterial infection - doc can't figure out how a child taking as much nasal stuff as she is (Patanese, saline and Flonase switched to Nasonex) could be so congested.
  • Compacted "poo" - according to x-ray.  Ultrasound says everything else looks "normal."  Started her on Miralax instead of stool softeners - no noticeable difference.
  • Her optic nerves are slanted funny and thin (has a fancy name) -  which could cause the double vision when she's tired and her right eye drifts inward and doesn't track... except she was born with this and it's a new symptom.
  • Acid reflux - she's taking Nexium for this... might be why she can't tolerate acidic foods rather than an allergy to citric acid.
  • Hyper tension - blood pressure 126/90
  • Rule out - Ocular myashenia gravis {ruled out!  Yea!}
  • Rule out - Auditory Processing Disorder - waiting to get referral to ENT.


Kitty’s new thing is refusing to eat. She’s always wanted to be anorexic, but never had the willpower. Now she’s on Miralax twice a day and I think it’s filling her up just enough to take the edge off her hunger. She wants to be thin, and explaining healthy eating to a six year old with mental health issues… all I get is “NO” and “I’m not hungry.”

Me: “Have you had breakfast yet?”

“No, and I’m not going to.”

Me: “You need to eat so your meds work properly.”

“I’m not hungry.”

Me: “I understand that, but you know that your body doesn’t always tell you what it’s feeling. You need to eat a little bit, because your body needs food.”


Me: “Our bodies were designed for food.”

“I’m not hungry.”

Me: “I know, but you still need to eat a little bit. Your body was designed to need small meals all day.”


Me: “If you don’t eat, then your body will get sick. You will have to go to the hospital and they will make you eat.”


Me: “No is not an option. You need to eat. I understand that you want to lose some weight, but not eating won’t work. You will get sick. You’ll end up in the hospital and they will make you eat. Plus, you know if you don’t eat, your body thinks you’re starving so it actually hangs onto the fat.”

“I’m not hungry. If you make me go to the hospital, I’ll kick and scream.”

Me: “I understand that. That will be the ambulance driver’s problem not mine. You still have to eat a little bit so you don’t need to go to the hospital.”


Me: “No is not an option. You need to eat a little so your body and your meds work and you stay stable. You don’t want to end up back in the psych hospital.”

“I’m not hungry”

Me: “I get that, but your body needs food.”


Me: “I’ll pick you up from school at 11 to take you back to the doctor.”

This has been a problem for years, and we’ve always tried to focus on healthy eating (no diets). In the past, she’s never been able to follow through on threats to never eat again, and if not closely supervised usually ended up gorging, but for the first time I’m seeing some actual willpower. I know trying to force a child to eat is not the right thing to do, but she’s teetering on the edge of unstable and I just can’t take a wait and see attitude. These conversations are not while sitting at the dinner table – they’re at random places when she’s “calm.” I’m not arguing with her, I’m just making calm, empathetic statements. Variations of this conversation have been going on for 4 days (since we started on Miralax twice a day). She’s eaten a very small amount, when forced, but I’m not with her all the time so she’s barely eaten. She’s under a doctor’s care, but I’m scared. This doctor doesn’t get the big picture and Kitty has so much going on that treatment is confusing.

She’s got a sinus infection. Her sinuses are completely clogged up despite taking saline and two nasal sprays daily for months. She’s seriously constipated, despite taking megadoses of stool softeners for years and now Miralax. Her urinalysis showed signs of a bacterial infection. She was vomiting off and on for a week. She’s still dizzy and complaining of double vision (but she’s decided she’s just going to “get used to this.”) She’s had a very low grade fever off and on. She has side pains. And now, a loss of appetite. They’ve sort of ruled out appendicitis, but other than that have no apparent idea what’s wrong.

When we go in for x-rays and things, she keeps insisting that she's "NOT SICK" and she's mad at me for making her do the testing.  When we did the ultrasound on her abdomen the tech gave her a quick list of things to take off and do.  (Take off your shirt, bra and pants, put the robe on with the opening to the back.) She came out for me to tie the robe with her bra and pants on.  I sent her back in to remove the items and she started arguing with me about what the guy said.  I finally asked another tech who told her yes, she did have to take her pants off and she came out saying, "I HATE YOU!" and repeating she wasn't sick.  She wants it to be true so badly that she almost believes it.  It's MY fault that she can't pretend it's true.

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