I think I posted that on the Saturday after Christmas, Kitty had packed a huge bag for her overnight to Grandma's house. After much argument, she had to leave it at home. We discovered later that she had planned to run away from home that day, and that she was jealous because I had given Bob highlights for her hair as one of her Christmas presents. This worked out because Bob was willing to share and Kitty got some highlights of her own.
Well the suitcase never got unpacked and it joined the long line of laundry that came out of Kitty's room when she went to Camp Crazy. Tonight it had finally reached the head of the line and I started emptying it out. Here's the note I found in one of the pockets.
I love you all but I must go because I feel like you love your real kid more than me
I am going to go were God is going to tell me to go
bye for now at lest (least).
Sorry I put you there (through) all the trouble
yours tarely (truely)
(signed with her full birth name - not her adopted name)
(I copied her picture of a broken heart as best I could. This is pretty much what it looks like. And how my heart feels right now too.)
2 comments:
Oh Mary, I'm so sorry you had to go through this. I really think that Kitty's note proves that she cares about you and your family. Just keep remembering how much you've gone through with Bear... a balance of meds will make a world of difference.
My boys were awful in 7th grade and when they were 15. DD is "awful" now, at 13. (She threw a mini tantrum just before dinner tonight -- not a completely rare occurance -- and that's without all the extra "initials" (EMDR, RAD, AT, etc) that your kids come with. I think kids have to go through stuff and that's normal, but then throw in all the issues your kids have and you get the full whammy.
I know I've simplified this and watered it down, and that you already know all of this, but I just want to tell you that you're not completely alone in the world. All of us parents have issues, whether or not our lives are as inside as yours, but you're not alone. And you are loved. We all care about you and pray for the best to come to you soon.
Hang in there Mary. Remember the note is coming from the thinking of a disturbed child and try not to take it personally.
You're an awesome MOM!!!
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