Blogging is abusive?

Kids and cousins wrestling in Grandma's yard.

So many fellow mommy bloggers with special needs kids have stopped blogging. Sometimes just for a short time and sometimes forever. Quite a few have gone private. Many of these moms have stopped because they are being persecuted and threatened.

Recently an amazing mom raising adopted horrifically abused special needs kids, had child protective services remove 3 of her children and came back with vans for the rest on Veterans Day (when everyone she could appeal to was closed for the holiday)! Her crime? Blogging. Seriously.

The reason they were removed, get ready for this, I have used poor judgement by blogging so the kids are in immediate danger. Seriously. I’m dangerous because I was blogging, have since shut it down, signed an affidavit that I wouldn’t do it anymore, and another to say I won’t video tape my kids. I couldn’t make this stuff up. Our other children are now also at risk for removal because of this.

Two amazing moms had to fight off cyber bullys who threatened their family. This group managed to find out the moms' personal info which they broadcast over the internet with lots of lies, and threatened to make false reports of child abuse. The group's goal was to have their daughter removed and put back in foster care.

Most of us use pseudonyms for our children, eliminate any identifying information, some don't include photos of our family, and some bloggers only post what their children give them permission to share. So many good parents are worried that someone will take the extremes that we sometimes have to go to in order to parent our extreme children and use it against us or our children.

Why do I blog? I've posted why I blog before. Basically it's a chance to:

• Vent without overwhelming my IRL (in real life) support group, and do it when I have time (you know, 2am or 2pm). Most of my friends are working and super busy so I'm limited in who I can talk to and when.
• Track - reminder of where we've been and how far we've come. Sometimes I'm just as guilty as Bear of forgetting the past, and if we forget the past, we're doomed to repeat it - or at least have it negatively affect our future.
• Support - a way to find and connect with other people who "get it," and keep connected to those who aren't nearby.
• Advice - getting advice from people who "get it" and have BTDT - been there and done that, and a chance to get new perspectives from others who maybe don't.
• Share - Keeping friends and family posted about what's going on in our lives without having to write a million e-mails, sitting on the phone for hours, or send out a ton of pictures. Also don't have to worry about the kids overhearing.
• Helping - I like helping others and I hope that my blog and experiences do that.
• Verbal Affirmation - My love language! I don't get a lot of praise or reassurance IRL, in fact it's quite the opposite with my kids.

Reasons to stop blogging:

• I spend a lot of time on the internet, reading blogs, forums and list serves. Time I could be spending with my family, sleeping, or doing things for my family, work or myself.
• Bear is using it as an excuse to not talk to me because I'll "put it on my blog and share it with our neighbor and people in Africa." (of course I'd share it with our neighbor anyway if she had time to listen).
• Maybe I'm putting too much into the blog and not real life.

So for now I think I'll cut back on some of my other internet activities and keep blogging.