This blog is my place to vent and share resources with other parents of children of trauma. I try to be open and honest about my feelings in order to help others know they are not alone. Therapeutic parenting of adopted teenagers with RAD and other severe mental illnesses and issues (plus "neurotypical" teens) , is not easy, and there are time when I say what I feel... at the moment. We're all human!

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Dressing Your Truth - NOT an advertisement

Raising kids with RAD leads a LOT of moms to emotional eating.  (Food as a substitute for the love the kids can't give you).  I have done many things to fill my love tank and feel better about myself, including eating a LOT!).  I tend to be a comfort eater and have gained and lost about 70lbs several times over my lifetime.  Right before we adopted I'd lost that 70lbs on the South Beach diet and was feeling pretty great.  The first few years with Kitty and Bear put it all back, and then some.

Last year, I went on and lost about 30lbs before I hit a plateau.  I was feeling pretty good about myself.  I recently started doing physical therapy for some hip problems, and while I haven't lost any more weight, I am more toned.

Recently I found a program that helped me feel better about myself the way I am right now (although I'd still like to lose those last 40lbs) .  Dressing Your Truth ( is only a quasi-scientific program, and it's really focused on selling you their full program, BUT I found that after I figured out my Type (which is free!), I was able to figure out (through research on the internet) the colors and shapes that look most flattering on me.  PLUS, it made me feel better about some personality "quirks", I've always felt guilty about.

I'm a Type 1, Air, which are people who tend to be bright, animated, and high energy (when I'm not totally stressed by raising RAD kids!).  One way of describing my type is full of ideas, but not always great on the follow through.  I grew up around other Types (mostly Type 2, the planners/ list makers) and felt super guilty about not being like them.  Kitty is also a Type 1, and I found myself negatively judging her the same way I felt judged.  This was a very freeing program.

I got rid of all of my black clothing (only one type looks good in black which is a very calm, quiet color), and love that my new figure means I don't have to feel guilty about getting new clothes, cause I was going to have to do that anyway.  I did the Color Me Beautiful color typing thing many, many years ago and I'm a Winter, which means I should look good in Black, White, and Jewel tones, but I've found that dressing according to my personality actually makes me feel better and I get lots more compliments (which speaks to my love language of Words of Affirmation).

Now that I'm sewing again, I love being able to make clothes that flatter my figure, in bright, fun colors.

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