World's Meanest Mom Award - Best Costume

For years I've been threatening to embarrass the kids by wearing something crazy if I had to keep going to the school if they forgot something. Kitty was by far my worst offender. She would leave her lunch in the back seat of the car, her project/homework in the house "somewhere", one dance shoe under her bed, but the worst has been forgetting to take her meds in the morning.



Some of this is normal kid stuff. Some is really due to the kids' issues so not technically their "fault." Usually the kids get natural consequences because we rarely go out of our way to bring the missing item to school. The meds of course cannot be missed (I care for the teachers too much to do that to them!).



At the beginning of the school year I found the perfect outfit in a thrift shop for only a few dollars! A tiedye t-shirt in neon multi colors and best of all matching shorts! I was so excited! I showed the kids my new embarrasing outfit and it worked! No one forgot anything for weeks! Then of course the fear wore off. They didn't think I'd go through with it. BWAAAHAAHAHA! They don't know me very well do they?!



But... I didn't get to wear my new outfit, because I usually realized meds were forgotten only when I was already dressed and ready to go to work, and dropping meds off was going to make me late enough as it was. Kitty became complacent and the med forgetting became more and more frequent. "Big mistake. Big. Huge!" (recognize that quote?)



Recently my partner in crime friend and neighbor Sharon and I made a late night run to the grocery store together (We love doing this! Each leaving our 4 kids with our husbands and laughing and giggling like juvenile delinquints). One of Sharon's sons had recently begun scaring one of his little sisters and she had warned him to stop or he'd see how it felt to be scared. She came to me, as the Meanest Mom in the World, for some advice on how to do this. I advised waking him up in the middle of the night with a whistle (I suggested an air horn, but she didn't have one and it probably would have woken kids in other rooms too) and dumping ice water on him. Then going to bed, leaving him to clean it up himself. (Don't go judging me, this is a "neurotypical" 11 year old who knows better!).



This is background info to show my frame of mind for what came next.



I was on my way to meet with friend Sharon to discuss our new plan to join forces and ruin our kids' Summer* when I realized that Kitty had forgotten her meds yet again. Knowing that Sharon would get a kick out of it, and having already taken the morning off work, I decided it was the perfect time to implement my evil plan.




I have lost a little bit of weight, and my lovely tie dye shorts were a size 20. I realized I could slide them and the over sized t-shirt right on over my work clothes! I rolled up my work pants, added some holey neon striped toe socks, slipped on my hot pink mules... and voila! I was ready to go! I grabbed Sharon to provide the camera work (and enjoy the fun) and off we went.



I wasn't allowed to go in Kitty's classroom, but while we waited for her to be brought to me, I did stand out in the hallway and tell everyone who passed by whose Mom I was and that I was there so she would never forget anything again. I'll let you know if it worked!

* Sharon and I have decided to combine forces (and children) and create a Summer program for our kids. We'll be doing things like aerobics at my house with all the children, doing a little bit of academics (Sharon was my girls' teacher at the private school and Grandma is certified to teach all ages), chores, swimming, field trips...).

Should be fun and entertaining despite the age range. Her girls are in 3rd grade this year, I think. Ponito and her youngest son are 11 (only 2 weeks apart and the story of how Sharon and I met is best left for another time, but lets just say I asked to see her son's winkie), Kitty, Bob and her oldest son are all in 8th grade this year, and of course Bear is almost 17.

Any child who doesn't want to participate or causes trouble can come to work with me (Sharon's kids too). "It's good to be the king!"