Option 2: Attachment to Committment
Option 3: Status Quo
Purplewalls: "Anxious to hear what you all decided, though I have to admit I don't see how option #3 is better than #1. (#2 I don't get at all... me being an "outsider" and all.)"
We haven't actually made a decision yet. As of Saturday's discussion with Bear's therapist I strongly felt we should go with Option 2, but Hubby apologetically came to me and said he didn't think he had the stamina to get through it. So we decided to stick with Option 3. Then his behavior has gotten even worse, and we're discussing Option 3, but even stricter.
To answer Purple's, question, 3 is different from 1 because none of my kids are treated like other people's "normal teens." Actually there are a lot of people with "normal teens" who are as strict or stricter than I am, but not a lot.
- My son doesn't have a cell phone.
- He has a 9pm bed(room) time.
- He is not allowed to go anywhere, even church youth group, without an adult family member. This includes leaving our front yard. We adults are pretty busy so he rarely goes anywhere.
- He is not allowed to watch PG-13 or rated R movies.
- Only Christian music is allowed.
- He is not allowed to watch most cable channels. Even if it's an appropriate movie, if it's on a channel that advertises inappropriate shows like Degrassi and 16 year old parents. No Spongebob, Grossology, Recess... nothing on Cartoon Network (it has one or two appropriate shows, but it was easier to nix it than to argue about it).
- I don't buy fried or sugary treats, sodas, or keep the house stocked with junk food. No caffeinated beverages allowed.
- Even when he earned an allowance (which he doesn't anymore because he owes everyone money), he wasn't allowed to keep it in his pocket. I had final say on what he spent it on.
- If he has friends over, especially girls, they must remain in the common areas of the house. Not even in the upstairs playroom because an adult needs to be able to see them easily.