This blog is my place to vent and share resources with other parents of children of trauma. I try to be open and honest about my feelings in order to help others know they are not alone. Therapeutic parenting of adopted teenagers with RAD and other severe mental illnesses and issues (plus "neurotypical" teens) , is not easy, and there are time when I say what I feel... at the moment. We're all human!

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Weighing in

Took my 5'9" fully grown 16 year old son to the psychiatrist. He weighed in at 210lbs. Out of curiosity I stepped on after him (didn't let him look). OMG I weigh 212! *sigh* I have NEVER weighed this much. Even 9 1/2 months pregnant after having gained 70lbs during my pregnancy I was still 7lbs less and I lost 20lbs the next day and 20 more pounds within the next 2 weeks(gave birth to Bob and most of it was water weight).

My sister's wedding is in 2 months. I'm Matron of Honor, and my little sister is... little. I already look freakishly tall next to her as she is only 5'3" and I'm 5'7". (This is my little sis and my niece and nephew).

I went to the doctor for a check up. Will find the results of my thyroid test soon, and need to be fasting for the rest of the tests. My doctor is very understanding about my stress levels. I told him that I was worried about not being able to stay on my meds consistantly, and he advised me that I should be able to go back on my meds full strength unless I'd been off them for more than a few days.

I mentioned how upset I was about my weight gain, and how frustrated I am that I can't sleep. He was very sweet and said he would like to see me lose 10-15lbs, but he wasn't going to give me a hard time about it (because I have enough stress). Of course I wouldn't mind losing 10-15lbs but would prefer losing 70-75! This is not a good weight for me, and no matter how many times I watch How To Look Good Naked (which is a great show by the way), feeling good about myself doesn't mean I don't need to lose the weight.

So I started South Beach yesterday. Now I've got to figure out how to start exercising. I'd love to take my fat dogs out walking, but the Husky (80+lbs) pulls so hard she's miserable to walk with.

My sweet fat Prince Cuddles blew his ACL again, and is limping (we can't afford to get it fixed right now) so no walks for him.

Princess, our "puppy" is so undisciplined... ah, who am I kidding...
it's COLD out there. I am NOT an outdoor person.

It's just going to have to be me and Richard.
I want to go from this -------------------------> back to this.
This is realistic I think. The picture on the right was after having two kids, and only 10 years ago.


Mom 4 Kids said...

You go girl! I need to be right there with you. But there is a reese's in the kitchen with my name on it. Sigh. Maybe I'll get inspired watching you!

Jeri said...

And then the Girl Scouts are there..with their incredible puppy like eyes and lisps and missing teeth. I don't wanna be could I turn them down, it was freezing, they looked tired, they practiced their math to make my change....oh heck, it's Girl Scout Thin Mints (which just don't taste quite as good when covered in guilt). I am walking my fat dogs because I don't want to pick up 90 lb. dog poo in the garage! About that ACL, can they take Glucosamine? You know, I'm crazy about the magic abilities of my Glucosamine.

Anonymous said...

You are so brave. You don't see me posting my weight anywhere, including my own personal, password-protected journal. My neice is getting married in September and my sister wants to lose 60 lbs. I told her I'd support her and help her. I'll do the same for you.

Start tomorrow by parking far away from the door whereever you go and forcing yourself to walk it. And drink more water. They say it burns calories to process it, and it doesn't add any!

Oh, and Thin Mints can't be fattening, otherwise they wouldn't be called "THIN" mints.

marythemom said...

I love you Denise!

It's warmer here in Texas, our little Girl Scouts live just down the street, and I just don't feel that sorry for them.

Someday I'll post the rules that got me here in the first place:

If you steal it off someone's plate and they don't catch you... it has no calories.

If it's broken or burned... then all the calories have leaked out.

If you're just trying to show the baby how to eat (see the little airplane? Open the hanger. Look, Mommy will show you.) ... it has no calories.

You get the idea though. One thing I love about South Beach is the frequent meals (6 small meals a day) keep you feeling full, and after the first 3 days (which are pretty hard) of no carbs or sweets, then you really don't crave them anymore... no really! I lost 40lbs last time and it took years (and 2 special needs kids and appetite increasing meds) to put them (and their stupid fat friends) back on.


marythemom said...

Oh, and I used to give Prince Glucosamine (I had a bunch left over after trying it for my bad knees - and discovering losing the weight helped more). Honestly I couldn't see any difference and I couldn't afford to keep buying the supplements and the stuff to force the dog to take them (he's not the worst about taking meds, but he's not the best either).

I think he's gingerly walking on it most of the time so I'm assuming it's not too painful but since my understanding is that it is separated muscle it probably won't ever really heal. We found a place that does the surgery for less than $500 (our vet wanted over $2500), but of course at this time we don't have any. Stupid economy.

Mary in TX