This blog is my place to vent and share resources with other parents of children of trauma. I try to be open and honest about my feelings in order to help others know they are not alone. Therapeutic parenting of adopted teenagers with RAD and other severe mental illnesses and issues (plus "neurotypical" teens) , is not easy, and there are time when I say what I feel... at the moment. We're all human!

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Overbooked week

Friday - Kids got out of school.

Monday, Memorial Day - Hubby couldn't go in to work, and we sat around and did nothing all day. I literally spent all day on the couch. It was nice. Boring for the kids, but tough! I needed the down time.

Tuesday -

  • 6am Kitty on a bus to Six Flags with 200 other 8th graders. She did OK, but didn't get home until after 10pm (usually she's had night meds and is in bed by 9pm).

  • 8:30am - Aerobics with the kids. Big argument with Bear because the new Hip Hop DVD was too hard and he was just shuffling and flipped when I told him he needed to move his arms and try. 20 minute argument about whether or not correcting him meant I was a bad mom who didn't love him. I reminded him that coaches correct and it's not because they're putting the kid down. Bob and Ponito left the room. Finally got Bear calmed down and he picked a different DVD. This time Bob refused to participate, so I gave her the usual consequence of doing another DVD (Richard Simmons which is much easier and Bob prefers - Bear won't work out to this video because he's uncomfortable about the "gay clown."). Yea for me, double the workout on the first day. *sigh* Oh well, it's good for me.

  • 9:30-11:30 - constant redirection on chores. I really cracked the whip. Usually they wave a hand at the chore (or lie and pretend they did) and no one checks it. Since Kitty wasn't there, I made them do a deep cleaning. (Kitty can't handle this without major meltdowns).

  • 11:30 - finally driving the kids to Grandma's so I can finally get to work! Bear found out that I had a meeting about him that he was not going to have input on. He wanted to pick a fight, and sniped at me. Saying something about the kids doing all the work and me sitting on my booty all day working on my computer. I called him on it. He escalated and I refused to back down. He started threatening to never see us again after he left home. I said we'd still be here whether he liked it or not. He didn't run though and he did calm down after being dropped off at Grandma's. A couple of hours later he called me to apologize! It actually sounded sincere.

  • Work for a couple of hours (forget to eat all day - had a handful of trailmix at work, then grabbed and ate cookie dough in the car to get me through the CRCG meeting.

  • 3pm - Meet with the CRCG group. This is a Community Resource team that sit down with each family they work with and brainstorm on ways to get the child the services they need.
  1. The local MHMR was represented and this got them to move up our intake appointment so if we get in, which we hopefully will, then we can get a psychiatrist ASAP.

  2. They suggested some volunteer work for Bear with a program called the ROCK. (this is a place that does therapeutic horseback riding for special needs kids). I needed a place he could be for 4-5 hours a day where he would be well supervised, and this doesn't meet the bill, but we're going to do it anyway. All 4 kids want to volunteer and the younger two have to be supervised by a parent so I'll be there too.

  3. They got me in touch with the Special Ed Parent Liaison, who I haven't actually been able to talk to yet.

  4. They offered a chemical dependency counselor, but I don't think we need this yet.

  5. They gave me some advice about how to get what we need at the next ARD

  • Forgot Kitty was going to be at Six Flags and didn't cancel her therapy appointment so I took the appointment alone and got some support.

Wednesday - Aerobics, chores, and hurry Ponito to a dentist appointment. I'd discovered he had holes in his teeth. Two teeth with holes were right next to each other and you could fit a pea in the hole. Good news. The cavities and decay were all in baby teeth that were going to be falling out in the next 6 months so we only had to pay for the x-rays. The dentist even accidentally knocked out one of the teeth with the biggest hole and it flew across the room and hit me on the arm! I told Ponito I was going to tell y'all he bit me! *grin* Tooth Fairy came, but couldn't find the box with what was left of the tooth. She had to give me the $.40 (going rate is $1 - but this tooth wasn't worth that!). He woke up when I was trying to find the tooth and showed me where it was. Ironically we rented the movie Tooth Fairy the day before (It's cute by the way).

Kitty forgets her morning meds, but manages to hold it together!

I actually worked for 4 hours! Forgot to eat again, can't seem to squeeze it in. Made some soup at work, but forgot and left it in the microwave. Then went to the grocery store and shopped for 2 hours. Watch Twilight 2 with the kids. Kitty has had trouble with this movie, but seems to mostly handle it.

Thursday - More aerobics drama. Did not push the chores as much, but we still didn't get out of the house until almost noon. Probably cause I actually had breakfast. Got to work and was there for 10 minutes before I got a reminder call from my friend Struggling to Stand. I finished reheating and eating the soup I'd left in the microwave the day before and rushed over. (Shh! Don't tell Hubby I spent less than 30 minutes at work today!). She'd offered me a job making some curtains for her (yea! a little extra money, spending time with a friend, and a chance to see if I want to go back to sewing for extra money). Spent a couple hours with her and one of her adorable sons in the fabric store (couldn't find the "perfect" fabric). Got lost heading to Grandma's to pick up the kids. Found out they weren't there anyway. Picked them up at home, and then got lost on the way to the ROCK. *sigh* The kids seem to really like it. The people there know a little about Bear and Kitty's issues and seem OK with it. The volunteer coordinator is actually thinking about adopting, from the same agency we adopted through! Now all we need to do is attend volunteer training.

Friday - intake appointments for both Kitty and Bear at the MHMR facility so we can get their psychiatric needs met. Should know if we're going to have to close our company's doors by today too. Hope I get to spend a few minutes at work. We'll see.


GB's Mom said...

That sounds like an ideal volunteer situation :)

Miz Kizzle said...

Richard Simmons? I'd consider that cruel and unusual punishment. Have you ever heard him enthuse over how firm his mother's breasts are?
Excuse me. I must go vomit.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like you're gettting some good help for Bear and Kitty. Hope it all works out...

Um, isn't the point of sending Bear to volunteer to get him supervised so you can work for a few hours a day? Having you go too doesn't sound like a real solution.

Anonymous said...

keep update, please..bless you!!........................................

Integrity Singer said...

keep us posted about the business please (from one business owner to another)

marythemom said...

Miz Kizzle - umm, no, I have never heard Richard Simmons talk about his personal life. Nor do I care to. I know he has lots of dalmations as pets, seems to really care about his clients, and is openly gay. I saw him once on Who's Line Is It Anyway. That's about it. All I care about is that this is a 20 minute video, the routine is easily learnable and doable (hard to find for Kitty), and it's low impact.

Purple - I'd love to be able to drop Bear off somewhere he enjoys and I know is supervising him, but I haven't been able to find any such options. At least this way he's getting to do something he enjoys so he's not whining about not getting to do anything all Summer.

怡君 and Jennie - no news on the job front. I didn't go in to work on Friday, but I asked the sales guy to call me if anything happened so I figure no news is no news.