This blog is my place to vent and share resources with other parents of children of trauma. I try to be open and honest about my feelings in order to help others know they are not alone. Therapeutic parenting of adopted teenagers with RAD and other severe mental illnesses and issues (plus "neurotypical" teens) , is not easy, and there are time when I say what I feel... at the moment. We're all human!

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Trying to be Thankful

Kitty’s regular psychiatrist left her on the meds that the hospital put her on! She didn’t want Kitty on Lamictal in the first place because she apparently thinks I’m lying about why we pulled Kitty off it 2 years ago (every time she broke out in hives they’d pull her off, “just in case.” Since she was so prone to hives she broke out all the time, we didn’t see a point in keeping trying).

The pdoc also refused to write any notes helping us out with school. Well, that’s not totally true. She wrote a prescription saying Kitty should be “evaluated for homebound.” Which the school can easily ignore by saying they already did that. It’s time to find a new pdoc. One more thing to add to my list of things to do.

I did talk to Nebraska about RTC, and they thought they had a couple of weeks (as did we of course). They’re still waiting for information about the two residential treatment centers we’re interested in (Settlement Home and Center for Success and Independence in Houston). Once they determine what services are offered, then they'll know how much they can pay (assuming they approve) and then they can start negotiating with the locations, at which point we can start waiting for a bed.

Poor Kitty! I see no way to keep her from having to go back to school. Only consolation is that she may quickly end up back in the psych hospital (never this one again of course!).


Thanksgiving was lovely. We had lunch and dinner at my sister's house. Hubby made homemade rolls and they turned out perfectly! I made most of the sides. There was so much delicious food that we had leftovers even after eating both lunch and a dinner of leftovers there.

All 6 cousins (ages 9, 12, 12, 15, 16, and 18) played together ALL afternoon and evening. They played video games (mostly bowling and dancing with Mich*al Jacks*n - they videotaped the dancing- hilarious!!), they played outside on the teetertoter (after hours on it the girls were complaining of jelly legs! lol!) and noodled around with a soccer ball. Bear got a little bossy, but otherwise they had a great evening.

The guys watched football and my mom, my sister and I put together a puzzle. It was so relaxing. I even got in a little cat nap or two. I'd stayed up until 4am the night before.


I can't believe it, but I'm goign to go shopping on Black Friday. Santa is bringing the kids a W i i and the used game store has some previously owned systems on sale.

I can't believe how little Cmas shopping I've gotten done. The kids are hard to shop for this year! I miss the days when I could buy a few used toys and they'd love them.


Johanna said...

Can you pull Kitty out and home school her? At least in the interim until she gets placed in residential? or will that put RTC in jeopardy? Hoping your Christmas shopping goes quickly!!

marythemom said...

Unfortunately Kitty has several learning disabilities that make homeschooling, private school and even charter school very difficult. Plus, I've done homework/workbooks with her when we tried private school and it was really rough on our relationship. She's more attached now, but I've got to admit it would still make me nervous.

Homebound is kind of an option, if we can force the school to let her, but I am a little nervous about it.


Johanna said...

I know what you mean about homeschooling being difficult on a relationship. I took my kiddo out for about six weeks at the end of a school year during the time that he was first being diagnosed/treated for a mood disorder because he had no IEP and the school couldn't control his behavior. It was really rough on our relationship. School becomes such a huge problem when our kids don't fit in. I wish your school was an ally instead of yet another enemy in your fight to help your daughter.

Anonymous said...

Don't think I've commented here before, mostly a lurker, but I was just thinking... Kitty doesn't seem like she's getting much out of school right now anyway. What if you homeschooled her for say a year, without putting much emphasis on actual school work? Focus on attachment, her mental health, and more "life skills" stuff (helping you cook, shop, etc.) I guess it depends on how strict your state is when it comes to homeschooling laws.

(I don't want it to sound like you should give up on her and not expect her to learn any more, I hope it doesn't sound that way. I'm just thinking if she's getting so little out of school right now anyway, being in and out of the hospital, going to the nurse all the time, etc. PLUS it being so bad for her mental health, then what's the point really?)

marythemom said...

Lurking Lurker - In a previous comment I did address some of the issues with homeschooling, but I want to add that while homeschooling is an option, it is one fraught with difficulties.

For one thing, Kitty is an extrovert, she craves peer interaction, she would HATE the idea of homeschooling on any kind of long-term basis (although she'd probably be fine with it right now because she's focused on her inability to maintain her "mask" at school).

Secondly, Heather will need services when she graduates and we'll need as much documentation as we can get.

Third, at some point I hope to be able to go back to work. We could really use the income.

It looks as though homebound might be an option though. Will know more after her IEP meeting on Tuesday.