This blog is my place to vent and share resources with other parents of children of trauma. I try to be open and honest about my feelings in order to help others know they are not alone. Therapeutic parenting of adopted teenagers with RAD and other severe mental illnesses and issues (plus "neurotypical" teens) , is not easy, and there are time when I say what I feel... at the moment. We're all human!

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Kitty's coming home?

During Kitty's IEP meeting on Friday we got 2 calls from the hospital. They wanted to discharge Kitty immediately, because :

  • she was "fine" there

  • she didn't need any med changes (we disagree),

  • since she's been hospitalized so many times they have to assume hospitalization is "not working"

We had an appointment with the pdoc that afternoon so we told them we wanted to wait until the meeting to decide. After waiting 1/2 hour we found out that the pdoc had been called away on an emergency sometime before we'd arrived, but no one had realized it.

We managed to meet with the new social worker. We expressed our disagreement with their reasons for sending Kitty home. We don't care what she does at the hospital, she's becoming increasingly aggressive at home, and she's not "fine" there. The hospital may not be "working," but we don't have any other alternatives.

We were supposed to hear back from the pdoc by phone on Saturday and me managed to convince them to hold onto her until then. He didn't call.

We're meeting with the social worker in an hour. I have a feeling she's going to try to send Kitty home today.

The good news is that we finally heard from the residential treatment center. Kitty's been accepted and we're just waiting for the financial negotiations with our funding source. She may go as early as Wednesday.

1 comment:

Lisa said...

What a relief about the RTC!!

You know, I figured out a long, long time ago that my son will inevitably do well in one of two situations even when he's tanking at home. The first might be school - as long as he's flying under the radar and no one is paying attention or holding him accountable for his constant lying, stealing and disrespect (sounds nuts, but it has happened). The second seems to be a very structured, reward based environment like the hospital. I won't give him whole bags of candy because he steals everyone's snacks here constantly (I buy 2 half gallons of ice cream for 12 people and he eats them both - in the middle of the night - guess who doesn't get ice cream the next time I buy it?) and yet the hospital will give him an entire big bag of skittles or m&m's for winning at bingo (and they play endless games all day long). I make him shower and then send him back in to shower properly when he comes out with his hair dry and smelling worse than when he went in. They believe him when he says he's showered and give him tokens to trade for - you guessed it - food and more privileges. I don't honestly know exactly how long he could keep it up, but 17 days is how long he did it the only time he's been hospitalized and he wanted to stay longer because he liked it there. It makes me think that jail won't be as hard for him as I tend to think it will be. If I know this, I'm quite sure the professionals at the hospitals have figured out that kids CAN hold it together. Actually, now that I write this, couldn't holding it together in certain situations be another sign of mental illness? Maybe they can disassociate from the situation enough to make it thru. Maybe convincing the people at the hospital that she really doesn't need to be there is proof of her ability to manipulate and further push her toward a personality disorder dx. Just food for thought.

I hope the transition to RTC goes well.