This blog is my place to vent and share resources with other parents of children of trauma. I try to be open and honest about my feelings in order to help others know they are not alone. Therapeutic parenting of adopted teenagers with RAD and other severe mental illnesses and issues (plus "neurotypical" teens) , is not easy, and there are time when I say what I feel... at the moment. We're all human!

Friday, December 31, 2010

A Year in Review

As I look back over the year, I can't believe how much has changed. Some of it seems like it's been this way forever. I still can't believe that it was this year when Kitty showed her first major sign of healing from RAD. It seems longer.

A year in review:


  • It snowed! (This is a big deal because it only happens about every seven years around here).
  • Hubby left our company and started engineering contract work with a large company - which he hates.
  • We fired Bear's therapist.
  • My little sister got married.
  • Went to the Katharine Leslie seminar in Fort Worth and did a series of posts on her amazing work and what I learned there.
  • Hubby and I celebrated our 16th anniversary.
  • KITTY ASKED IF I WAS "OK"!! (and cared about the answer) This was a major sign that she has healed from RAD.
  • The three older kids get confirmed in the church.
  • We make over 100 dozen cookies for various events this year.
  • I lost a little weight even though I stopped working out at the end of Summer.
  • I turned 40.
  • I introduce my rainbow tie dye "don't forget your stuff or I'll wear this to your school" outfit.
  • We did a lot of life skills training and managed to convince Bear not to move out when he turned 17.
  • We discovered Bear and Kitty's legal age of adulthood is actually 19.
  • We have a quiet, strictly supervised Summer full of aerobics and volunteer work at vacation bible school and a place that does therapy through horseback riding.
  • My blog turns 2 and I get lots of support from my followers.
  • I get a new little brother. My dad and stepmom adopt a 13 year old boy.
  • I decided that my issues with bipolar were more my PTSD and stopped taking meds.
  • We had our first, and only, RAD Mom Meeting - got to try to do this more!!
  • We introduce The Soup Kitchen and use it for a little while. It triggers major foood issues for my RAD kids, especially Kitty.
  • My wonderful readers help me write letters to the school and for IEP meetings that help us get Bear what he needs in school.
  • Two amazing fellow Mom bloggers gift me with tickets to a Women of Faith seminar which charges my batteries.
  • Took him 7 months, but Bear finally earns his Zune!
  • Bear managed to pull it together and pull his grades up (after almost flunking out - if the school would have allowed him to), because he found out he couldn't be in the military due to his diagnoses, although he did end up back at the special school.
  • We celebrate our 4 year anniversary of the kids coming to live with us.
  • Bear skips class and lies about being beat up to the police. Could have been prosecuted as an adult, but "lucked out."
  • Our company is not making any money and lost a big lawsuit.
  • I give Hubby the gift of my time. I'm trying to come to bed early and I'm on an "internet diet." I'm not doing great at it, but I'm trying.

For the last three years we've been giving birthday gifts to Jesus. Kind of like New Year's Resolutions, but focused on what Jesus would want from us. Reading these has shown me the progress the kids have made. Especially Kitty's. Here's her last three:

2008:

"to God,

My thang that I need to work on is to stop Gloting (gloating) and stop being
rude and to be better at being Goodwhen I am being rude to my brother.
Please help me

love Kitty"

She added that she would try not to fight with Grandmother. This was really hard for her, but when I look back I realize she no longer "hates" her Grandmother and little brother. I haven't heard her call either of them "that evil (little boy/ woman)" in a very long time. I honestly don't think she feels that way any more.

2009:

"Make the world a better place by loving everyone. Spending time with my family."



"Spend more time with my family" was a major theme that year, so this year I told everyone they had to choose something else.

2010:

"I will try harder to stop the drama or avoid it."

My Jesus' gift was:

"I will try to be present and meet my family's needs, while taking care of myself."

I think that's a good one don't you?

1 comment:

J. said...

Great Review! Happy New Year, may this one be all that you want it to be and so much more.