This blog is my place to vent and share resources with other parents of children of trauma. I try to be open and honest about my feelings in order to help others know they are not alone. Therapeutic parenting of adopted teenagers with RAD and other severe mental illnesses and issues (plus "neurotypical" teens) , is not easy, and there are time when I say what I feel... at the moment. We're all human!

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Attachment Book?

So I met a man who has adopted with his wife two children of relatives. One is older now and seems to have adapted well (8 year old girl). The other was a more recent adoption and I believe the boy is 4 years old. He is showing classic attachment issues (of course I've never met the boy and have only talked to the father twice).

Of course attachment disorders came up in our conversation and I mentioned some local support groups and attachment therapists. The man seemed intrigued, but not enough to take any numbers. Today he sent me an e-mail and asked me:

"Also, out of all the choices available, what would you suggest as the first book or resource to read on the area of rejecting new parents?
-IF you had only one to choose..."

Now my kids are MUCH older and I do not want to scare him with Nancy Thomas. It didn't sound like the child was that severe. I do think the child needs an attachment therapist, and because this was a relative adoption the parents have had NO training whatsoever.

So what would you recommend for the parent of a young 4 year old with obvious attachment issues - he's been with the family for less than a year?


Torina said...

Daniel Hughes book was an easy read: Building the Bonds of Attachment: Awakening Love in Deeply Troubled Children

Or Our Own: Adopting and Parenting the Older Child by Trish Maskew because it covers so MANY different issues. Like ODD and eating disorders, FASD, and so much more.

Also, one website I would recommend above all others is:

Lisa said...

I haven't been ignoring this post I just agreed with Torina so I didn't post anything else. The only thing I might add is the website.

Linda Rosa said...

"Understanding Attachment" by Jean Mercer, Ph.D. (Praeger)

Brenda said...

Happiest Toddler on the Block by Dr. Harvey Karp. Maybe Beyond Consequences. It talks a lot about regulating yourself which is important as well.