This blog is my place to vent and share resources with other parents of children of trauma. I try to be open and honest about my feelings in order to help others know they are not alone. Therapeutic parenting of adopted teenagers with RAD and other severe mental illnesses and issues (plus "neurotypical" teens) , is not easy, and there are time when I say what I feel... at the moment. We're all human!

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

A Year In Review

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?
Adopted 2 children. Started a blog.

2. Did you keep your New Years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I didn’t really make a New Year’s resolution last year, but if I had it would have been to lose weight and get more exercise. So No, I did not keep my resolution. This year my resolution will be to spend more time with my kids and lose my “baby weight” and get more exercise.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
I had a bouncing 12 year old girl and a bouncing 14 year old boy!

4. Did anyone close to you die?
One of our kitties, Lady Moonlight, passed away.

5. What countries did you visit?
I didn’t leave the country, but I visited many different states. The states of Chaos, Confusion, and Disorder. I visited Hell, Insanity and Terror and decided I didn’t want to live there.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
Money, sleep, peace of mind, a stronger faith, calmness and wisdom.

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory?
January 7, 2008 The day Bear came home from the RTC
March 25, 2008 Kitty’s adoption day!
July 25, 2008 Bear’s adoption day!

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
I survived an emotionally and financially very tough year with most of my sanity intact!

9. What was your biggest failure?
My weight, and not living up to Hubby’s expectations of me at work.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
This year I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and the doctor is worried about my thyroid.
Bear separated his collarbone.
Kitty was tentatively diagnosed with bipolar disorder.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Until he was let go, I was loving the great deals we were getting from one of the guys at Salvation Army. Bags of clothes for $2-4. It was a life saver.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Bear made a HUGE turnaround this year. His time in the RTC and corrected diagnoses and medications have made such an amazing difference. We were afraid we weren’t going to be able to adopt him.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
I was very disappointed in Bob’s behavior this year. I expected more from her (maybe too much).
The employee we let go because she was insane. She shared way too much personal information (the fact that she gave up a child for adoption, her boyfriends erectile dysfunction…) with everyone (including Hubby) and was verbally abusive to staff. After we “laid her off” she e-mailed and left verbally abusive messages with staff, consultants, and Hubby. She even sent job postings to staff, talked to clients about when they were going to pay us so she would get her commission…

14. Where did most of your money go?
Into the business.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Nothing. I’ve been on mood stabilizers most of the year!

16. What song/album will always remind you of 2008?
Anyway, by Martina McBride. This is my “motto”

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: happier/sadder, thinner/heavier, richer/poorer?
Happier (we were so worried about Bear). Heavier. Poorer financially, but richer spiritually.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Spending time with the littles.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
At home. Mom and step-Dad, little sister and her kids will come to our house on Christmas Day.

21. Who did you spend the most time on the phone with?
Kitty, calming her down.

22. Did you fall in love in 2008?
I fall more in love every year with my family.

23. How many one night stands in this last year?
5-6. (With HUBBY!) Sometimes it feels like Hubby and I are just ships passing in the night.

24. What was your favourite TV program?
So embarrassing, but Rock of Love Charm School. It’s a reality TV show about trashy girls (from different seasons of a show I’ve never seen – something about wanting to date a rock ‘n’ roll star – like the Bachelor, but slutty). Sharon Osborn is the principal of Charm School and she teaches them manners and how to behave. The girl who doesn’t get expelled at the end, wins $100,000. - 146k -

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
I try not to hate anyone.

26. What was the best book(s) you read?
I read so many I couldn’t tell you. Katie McAllister – funny romances. Terry Prachett – punny fantasy/sci fi. Deborah Hage – attachment. Too many!

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Weird question. This was the first year where we didn’t listen to anything but Christian Rock. I’ve discovered I REALLY like it.

28. What did you want and get?
Kitty and Bear – no more social workers!

29. What did you want and not get?
All the answers. To be able to “fix” everyone and everything.

30. What were your favourite films of this year?
Ratatouille was good. So was August Rush. I even liked Tinker Bell. Meet the Robinsons. I really need to watch something besides the Disney channel!

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 38 this April. Honestly I don’t remember what I did (-barely remember what I did yesterday!). Guess I’m getting old! Hubby’s b-day is 3 days after mine and Kitty’s is 9 days after. I was probably too focused on Kitty’s b-day to even notice my own. I’m sure I ate chocolate though!

32. What's one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
I was going to say more money, but the truth is stronger faith would have made it more satisfying. More money just would have made it easier.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Costs less than $3, fits over my boobs and tookus, doesn’t show my rolls of fat, and still looks OK.

34. What kept you sane?
Mood stabilizers and anti-depressants!

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Santa Claus!

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Nebraska’s Safe Haven Law. Hopefully it brought needed attention to the broken foster care system.

37. Who did you miss?
Me. I used to sing and smile a lot more. That’s my New Year’s resolution -to be the happy person I used to be.
" Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain."

38. Who was the best new person you met?
My friend Lisa. I think I actually “met” her last year, but she has been one of the most inspirational people in my life.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
I learned so many!
I learned that Love is NOT enough, but it is still necessary.
I learned I’m stronger than I thought I was.
I’ve learned that I can’t control everything.
I’ve learned that there is more to learn!

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year?
Martina McBride/Brad Warren/Brett Warren

You can spend your whole life buildin'
Somethin' from nothin'
One storm can come and blow it all away
Build it anyway

You can chase a dream
That seems so out of reach
And you know it might not ever come your way
Dream it anyway

God is great, but sometimes life ain't good
When I pray it doesn't always turn out like I think it should
But I do it anyway
I do it anyway

This world's gone crazy and it's hard to believe
That tomorrow will be better than today
Believe it anyway
You can love someone with all your heart
For all the right reasons
And in a moment they can choose to walk away
Love 'em anyway

(Repeat Chorus)

You can pour your soul out singin'
A song you believe in
That tomorrow they'll forget you ever sang
Sing it anyway
Yeah sing it anyway

I sing
I dream
I love anyway


Lisa said...

Excellent list Mary! And thank you!
Big hugs from Squeaker II

Brenda said...

I LOVE Anyway. Great song. You've had a busy life changing year!