Was reading an excellent blog called Living With RAD, that as usual has provided some wonderful materials that really hit home.
This is an article she recommended:
RadKid.org has an excellent article about conscience development.
I learned that Kitty is right on the edge of the Pleasure/Pain stage (under age 3) of development and the Shame stage (typical of children ages 3 to 7). Bear is most likely in the Shame stage, and the rest of the kids are in the Mature stage. I liked this article because it gave concrete examples of how to help Kitty and I plan to give a copy to Grandma to help her better understand and cope with Kitty this Summer. Best of all, it specifically addresses attachment disorders and the needs of kids stuck in the younger development stages.